What the piss-sicle is happening, all you intrepid rock climbers who’ve angered a bunch of 80s movie villains by urinating off the side of a cliff and harrying them with shards of frozen pee and then seal the deal by inadvertently witnessing them spill giant bags of coke from their rucks, one of them shrieks in an angry mix of Eurotrash and English, whips out a rocket launcher and points it in your direction, you counter by jerking off quickly and encasing him in a prison of frozen cum, but since the vibe is from an eighties movie he explodes into a fiery mushroom cloud a few seconds later, the rocket streaks from the launcher and blows up behind you it sends you flying while triggering a devastating avalanche, you pull a fishing line and hook out of your bugout survival pouch and fling it at a nearby helicopter which just so happens to be puttering by, it wraps around the skid and you let loose with a slo-mo flame-jump-scream right as the mountain erupts in a series of gratuitously spectacular fireballs RUAAAAAHHHH—

Goddamn, haven’t you learned from all those eighties action movies???  You never, EVER pee on the evil-handsome dude who happens to be rocking an unnecessary pony tail!  Jesus!

Anyways, now that I’ve got your attention, let me direct it towards my various-genred books!  First up is my YA fantasy series, the Unbound Realm.  Volume 1 is A Door into Evermoor.  I’ve just published volume 2:  Weapons of Old  If you’re hankering for some psychedelic high school fun with a giant side of interdimensional monsters and teen genius hijinks, check out Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl!  If you want a big ol’ helping of robot vs. wizard pew pew, along with an extra serving of existential philosophy, check out my science fiction series Echo!  And don’t forget to leave a positive review for them!  Positive reviews—even though they only take a minute or two of your time—are like $1000 tips for us indie authors.  Every one of them is SUPER appreciated!  #Kindle #KindleUnlimited #writingcommunity #writer #booktok #writerscommunity #writing

🙂 🙂 😀