What the dickmatyzation is going on, all you super-penised last of the humans who’re fleeing from a mob of horny zombies (yes, they should make a movie of that if they haven’t already) swinging your beautiful vajeen-widener from side to side, then matador-style—OLE!—chucking it to the right and compelling your pursuers to run in droves off the side of a cliff while you grab onto a disintegrating rope bridge and scream something catchy as it arcs across a yawning chasm—

Better check yourself with that dickmatyzation—it’s not just about length anymore!  Got a good head-to-shaft ratio?  Girth and curve?  Also, it better not look like a baby mole-rat; it seems that nigh-translucent, cave-dweller coloring is NOT in line with modern-day preferences!

Anyways, now that I’ve got your attention, let me direct it towards my various-genred books!  First up is my YA fantasy series, the Unbound Realm.  Volume 1 is A Door into Evermoor.  I’ve just published volume 2:  Weapons of Old  If you’re hankering for some psychedelic high school fun with a giant side of interdimensional monsters and teen genius hijinks, check out Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl!  If you want a big ol’ helping of robot vs. wizard pew pew, along with an extra serving of existential philosophy, check out my science fiction series Echo!  And don’t forget to leave a positive review for them!  Positive reviews—even though they only take a minute or two of your time—are like $1000 tips for us indie authors.  Every one of them is SUPER appreciated!  #Kindle #KindleUnlimited #writingcommunity #writer #booktok #writerscommunity #writing

🙂 🙂 😀