I’m shocked into stillness as I see Richard Gere falling from the sky, screaming and flailing. As soon as he hits the ground he explodes, and entire oceans of killer gerbils flood outward from his butt. Tiny black, soulless eyes flash with malice as the horde sprints toward me. I turn and run, somersaulting over trashcans and dumpsters (Parkour!). My lungs begin wheezing, and in desperation, I shimmy up a tree. Bad move. I see an army of living buttplugs coming for me, hissing in rage. I open my eReader to Echo. Magic flash. Brilliant lines of radiance etch through the air a foot away from me, forming into a glowing, crackling Chuck Norris. My mouth drops open in wonder. He turns to me and says, “It’s a blaze avatar. I got the idea from reading your draft of Echo 3.” He extends his fists downward and rockets into the gerbils. BOOM! Crispy-fried rodents are sent flying in every direction. The smell of singed fur and poop wafts through the air. Gross!
Fend off armies of smelly, pint-sized killers with a magically instantiated blaze avatar. Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here: Vol. 1 on Kindle. Vol. 2 on Kindle here: Vol.2 on Kindle. Links for Vol.1 AND Vol.2 on Smashwords/Nook/iBooks/Kobo are available here: Echo on other platforms
I think I’ll use my kindle, Echo now loaded, on the filthy horde of stink bugs and spider crickets that are trying to infest my home. Go Chuck Norris, go. I’ll let you know what happens.
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Hahaha! Thank You So Much!!! 🙂
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As much as I didn’t want to, your descriptions of an exploding Richard Geer made me laugh. Then a second wave hit at the gross description of burning hair… and poop. I guess I’m in one of those twisted moods today. 😉
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I’m ALWAYS in a twisted mood! Thanks for joining me today in it, hahaha!
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You, sir, are a riot. But you already know that :D. Keep these coming. They never fail to make me laugh.
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No Problem! As long as I’ve got ideas, you’ll be reading ’em! 🙂
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Some stories just never grow old!
Glad Mr Norris is reading ‘good stuff’ Keep up the good work sir!!
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Hi! Quick question…The sword on the cover, is that for book 3?
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No. Book 3 has a really brief appearance by a sword but it’s like for a page. Sorry if that disappoints!
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Ha no, I was just curious. Thx!
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You’ve got me smiling at an extremely early hour in the a.m. I too can be a bit jaded and twisted on any given day. Thank you –
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No Problem! 🙂
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