What the pube-cough is happening, all you magnanimous oral adventurers who somehow manage to catch a hairball down your throat, you start hacking like a goddamn meth’d up cat, pounding your chest as your partner asks if you’re all right, you hold out a hand, trying to reassure them, but your face is already beet fucking red, your foot is shaking like a dog being scratched in the exact right place, sweat glistens on your brow and blood trickles out your ears, holy shit what the fuck is happening nails lengthen into claws, skin melts and bubbles, tongue splits into a goddamn barb-coated fork now you want to eat you some motherfucking BRAAAAAAIIIIINNNNSSS—
And THAT, my friends, is why you trim the bushes around your nether bits! You never know when your partner will gulp down a fist-sized hairball, and transform into a fucking devil-zombie hybrid! Fuck!
Anyways, now that I’ve got your attention, let me direct it towards my various-genred books! First up is my YA fantasy series, the Unbound Realm. Volume 1 is A Door into Evermoor. Paperback here: A Door into Evermoor, paperback. I’ve just published volume 2: Weapons of Old If you’re hankering for some psychedelic high school fun with a giant side of interdimensional monsters and teen genius hijinks, check out Kor’Thank: Barbarian Valley Girl! If you want a big ol’ helping of robot vs. wizard pew pew, along with an extra serving of existential philosophy, check out my science fiction series Echo! And don’t forget to leave a positive review for them! Positive reviews—even though they only take a minute or two of your time—are like $1000 tips for us indie authors. Every one of them is SUPER appreciated! #Kindle #KindleUnlimited #writingcommunity #writer #booktok #writerscommunity #writing
🙂 🙂 😀
I’m beginning to wonder if experience speaks 🤣🤣
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I’m pretty experienced 😏🤣
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No, don’t want to know 🤐😅.
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I was just kidding. I’m a virgin. 🤣
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Oh that experienced virgin. You’d be giving Madonna a run for her money 🤣
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I’m innocent and naive 🤫🤣
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Shall we compare our naivety and innocence? 🤣
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You don’t seem so innocent…😏🤣
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Are you sure? 🤣. I guess one recognizes another? 🤣
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What are you talking about? I’m a virgin 😇🤣
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That’s why I said, one recognizes the other 🤣
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I’m much more innocent than you! 🤣
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I’m sure it is the other way round. I’m an angel 😇🤣
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You sure you don’t want to be devilish with me? 🤣
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You said you’re innocent, you want a little devil?🤣
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I get the feeling you’d enjoy being a little devilish 🤣
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I think the little devil might need some encouragement to come out 🤣
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I feel like the devil isn’t that little 🤣
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Ah ha, and you know 🤭. Guess you want only a little 🤣
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I’m sure you want more than a little 🤣
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Don’t you want more 🤔🤣
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As much as you can handle 🤣
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And your handle is strong enough? 🤣
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Strong and curved! 🤣
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You’re quite proud of the curve. What is so special 🤔. Curious about the strength too 🤣
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The curve targets the right spot 🤣
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Do I get to try it out? It could help me find what I’ve lost 🤣
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Try it as many times as you like! The faster the better! 🤣
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How will I try it when you’re not sending it 🤣
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You really wanna try it, huh? 😏🤣
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If you don’t want to give 🤷♀️🤣
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I’ll give as much as you can take! 🤣
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Just make sure you have good supply. We don’t want supply-demand issues 🤣
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I’ll fill all your needs! 🤣
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Have to wait and see that ‘filling’ 🤣
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It’s delicious! 🤣
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Sample? 🤣
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I feel like you want way more than a sample, you want the whole entree! 🤣
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The entree is dependent on the sample 🤣
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You might just stop caring and devour everything in a frenzy 🤣
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So you say. Curious how the dessert would be then or if there would be any 🤣
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It would definitely be creamy! 🤣
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Ahhh cream, hope we can mix it up 🤣
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All kinds of fluids! 🤣
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I’m curious what fluids🤔🤣
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Milk and cream! 🤣
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You have milk? 🤣
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Tons! You’ll be drenched! 🤣
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Wasting food is not good 🤣
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Well I guess you’ll have to drink it all down! 🤣
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You can’t push to drink it all, choking hazard 🤣
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Maybe just slurp and lap it with your tongue 🤣
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Oh my 🫢. Are you giving me ideas 🤔🤣
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I hope so! 🤣
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And how do I help now? 🤣
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Pics and videos! 🤣
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🤣🤣. I’m not a fan of OnlyFans 🤣
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I think we could change that! 🤣
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How do we do that? 🤣
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I’ll just have to give you a memorable show! 🤣
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You will? When do I get to see the show? 🤣
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You go first! 🤣
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Why me? You’re the one ready to show 🤣
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You sure you haven’t seen it already? 🤣
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What are you saying 😱🤣. I may need a refresher for the new year 🤣.
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I refer you back to the kielbasa 🤣
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I don’t think the kielbasa is enough, does not do it justice 🤣
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Perhaps an extra-thick, custom-made kielbasa? 🤣
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Who makes custom made kielbasa? I’d have to order that 🤣
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I’ll get you some! A one of a kind! 🤣
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When do I get it? 🤣
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Whenever you want me to buy you a ticket!
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I thought I’ll be waiting for a huge package 🤣
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The ticket gets you to the package! 🤣
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You know Eve was tempted with the fruit, simple and inexpensive 🤣
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You want me to tempt you with an eggplant? 🤣
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Which variety? Here we have a variety 🤣
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Flared tip, big girthy stalk 🤣
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Oh you nut 🤣. How is it flared 🤔🤣
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Gotta squeeze the stalk, get the juices up to the top! 🤣
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I should hope it’s not too hard to squeeze 🤣
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It’s pretty hard. 🤣
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So it requires hard work? 🤣
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It’ll appreciate an enthusiastic effort 🤣
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If the enthusiasm reduces I’d hope for some help 🤣
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I’m an expert at rekindling enthusiasm! 🤣
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I’d like to see this expertise at play 🤣
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I’m sure you’d like to feel it as well! 🤣
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🤣. Some things can only be imagined 🤣
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You’re going to dream it into existence! 🤣
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Some dreams remain elusive 🤣
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Still pleasurable, though! 🤣
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But not enough 🤔🤣
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I wonder what will be enough? Would you ever be sated? 🤣
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What 😱. You’re sated with dreams huh 🤣.
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Definitely not. They’re just a warmup! 🤣
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How far do the warm ups go? 🤣
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You’ll be fully stretched out 🤣
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And what about you 🤣
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I’ll be at full extension as well 🤣
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You nut 🤣. I hope it doesn’t snap in between 🤣
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It quivers like a diving board. 🤣
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Oh my goodness, makes me want to see 🫣🤣
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You want to grab it? 🤣
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Is it that long to reach? 🤣
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It’s pretty long 🤣
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I’m not going to ask 😂. But I’m curious how to grab 🤣
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You’re pretty grabby 🤣
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What 😱🤣.. I bet you like grabby and 🤐🤐🤣
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I love grabby! Get as grabby as you like! 🤣
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I would if I could, I need extra long limbs 🤣
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Indeed you do! Match my length with yours! 🤣
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Oh my 🫣. Which length 🤣
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I leave that up to you! 🤣
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You’d be in big trouble then 🤣
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Bring on the trouble trouble! 🤣
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Trouble trouble can drive you crazy 🤣
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Crazy can be fun! 🤣
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As long as you don’t tire of crazy fun trouble 🤣
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I was coughing like that the other day at work myself. 🙂 Your books sound good, I like the covers.
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I’m glad it wasn’t for the reason I described, lol! Thanks for the kind words! The artists for the covers were awesome. 😊
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Thank you for your support all these years!
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[…] Give my books a read and a review!“ […]
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Thanks anyway! 🙂
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