What the cum-blindness is happening, all you adventurous deviants who’ve watched too many porns and now you and your partner have agreed that a cumshot would be cool, but when you unload in their face it goes in their eyes and triggers a deep, wordless rage that causes them to sputter and hack like a zombie from 28 Days Later, now you’re ducking and weaving as they snarl and gnash, leaving you no choice but to employ your deadly Muay Thai, but as you throw teeps and crosses and crisp snappy jabs, they tap into a panoply of Bloodsport-inspired powers, spiting your Bolo Yeung cumshot with slow-motion blocks and a devastating series of balletic splits jump-kicks—

Run, motherfucker, RUN!  You can’t fight a cum-zombie who throws Jean Claude splits-kicks!  Goddamn!

Anyways, now that I’ve got your attention, let me direct it towards my various-genred books!  First up is my YA fantasy:  A Door into Evermoor.  If you’re hankering for some psychedelic high school fun with a giant side of interdimensional monsters and teen genius hijinks, check out Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl!  If you want a big ol’ helping of robot vs. wizard pew pew, along with an extra serving of existential philosophy, check out my science fiction series Echo!  And don’t forget to leave a positive review for them!  Positive reviews—even though they only take a minute or two of your time—are like $1000 tips for us indie authors.  Every one of them is SUPER appreciated!  #WritingCommunity

🙂 🙂 😀



Comments

21 responses to “Give my books a read and a review!”

  1. hahaha, the horror of porn reality! 😀

    Liked by 1 person

  2. No! Not the 👁 👁! Come on! Aim better next time…you get what you deserve!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Agreed! 🤣

      Liked by 1 person

      1. See my above reply! HEH heh heh! 🤣😂🤣

        Liked by 1 person

    2. Sometimes it backfires—it ricochets off the wall and splats me in mug, turning me into a self-inflicted cum-zombie! 🤣😂🧟‍♂️

      Liked by 2 people

      1. One must practice great control when one wield such a powerful sword! 😉🤭🤣

        Liked by 2 people

      2. It’s taken many years…I’ve had to intensely study clips from Star Wars and Braveheart to figure out my two-handed technique. 😂🤣

        Liked by 2 people

      3. Haha wow! 😆

        Liked by 2 people

  3. my mouth dropped!!!

    Like

  4. ha ha ha ha ha! i know i am beautiful but prem- ejac is so not cool! you need more practice, a zillion years of jacking off was no prep for too much porn and the reality of playing with bodies! lol Warm up the oven gloves i will bake you some cookies! falic shaped obviously for your liking and i promise to spill the sauce down my top and let you lick the icing! lol😜🌹

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I’m not the only one who’d be licking icing…😂

      Liked by 1 person

      1. What a waste my goddess body bags are beautiful, just look at all the genetic lines i caught with my olive skin! My world! My boobs are epic i think you might change your mind, movie stars and musicians love me! bit of cream and some strawberries! you can make a meal of it! lol🤣 literally

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Definitely a boob man, so you’re saying all the right things! 😂

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Well while my gingerbread man is running! you are perfectly welcome to bury yourself deep, as long as you do not mind the world watching! I am the queens daughter lol🤣 sex ed. 101.

        Liked by 1 person

      4. Noted! I usually start off slow and deep, so the vajeen can adjust to the girth. 😂

        Liked by 1 person

      5. There you go with your dick-tionary! like i said instant ejac… airing my mind guest’s is naughty! Note 🗒 It is all good!😊 banter is fun and under-rated!

        Liked by 1 person

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