What the shaved asshole is happening, all you overachieving groomers who revel in the feel of a smooth, hairless bum, tingling with the slight burn of some in-grown-hair-fighting aftershave, only to forget the sonic amplification of bare-ass buttcheeks which leads to an extra loud clap when you try and release a normally silent fart—pa-PAP PAP!—drawing a round of horrified glances while you stare straight ahead, sweat beading on your temples, neck bulging conspicuously as you gulp in dread, what now what now Dear God the only options left are to jump out the window or reclaim your dignity through improvised seppuku—

And THAT, my friends, is why you play it extra careful with the silent but deadly after you chop down that jungle surrounding your butthole!  There’s no excuse to imitate fireworks or bubblewrap with your clean-shaven cheeks!  Goddamn!

Anyways, now that I’ve got your attention, let me direct it towards my various-genred books!  First up is my YA fantasy series, the Unbound Realm.  Volume 1 is A Door into Evermoor.  I’ve just published volume 2:  Weapons of Old  If you’re hankering for some psychedelic high school fun with a giant side of interdimensional monsters and teen genius hijinks, check out Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl!  If you want a big ol’ helping of robot vs. wizard pew pew, along with an extra serving of existential philosophy, check out my science fiction series Echo!  And don’t forget to leave a positive review for them!  Positive reviews—even though they only take a minute or two of your time—are like $1000 tips for us indie authors.  Every one of them is SUPER appreciated!  #Kindle #KindleUnlimited #writingcommunity #writer #booktok #writerscommunity #writing

🙂 🙂 😀