Check out my high school absurdical, Kor’Thank: Barbarian Valley Girl! (Yes, I know “absurdical” is a made up word)

Idiot demon-jocks, tons of profanity, copious psychedelics, and an airborne kiss at 300 mph, hanging from the back of a mushroom-shaped mecha!  All this and more in my comedy/horror/sci-fi absurdical, Kor’Thank: Barbarian Valley Girl! #Kindle #KindleUnlimited #writingcommunity #writer #booktok #writerscommunity #writing

Check it out here: Kor’Thank: Barbarian Valley Girl

Get A Door into Evermoor here: A Door into Evermoor.  Get Weapons of Old here:  Weapons of Old  Get Kor’Thank here:  Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl.  Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here:  Vol. 1 on Kindle.  Vol. 2 on Kindle here:  Vol.2 on Kindle  Vol. 3 on Kindle here:  Vol. 3 on Kindle  Vol.4 on Kindle here:  Vol. 4 on Kindle  Echo Omnibus here:  Echo Omnibus  Echo Vol. 1 & 2 Combined Edition here:  Combined Edition  Musings, Volume 1 is available here:  Musings, Volume 1  Here’s the miscellaneous gear that I use to try and become an uber-human:  Optimization!  🙂 🙂 😀

Hold on!  I just got approved to be an Amazon affiliate!  If you’re going to buy ANY product from Amazon, and you’d like to support my efforts for absolutely free, then simply click on one of the Echo links I’ve provided—they’ll send you to Echo’s Amazon page—and THEN buy whatever product you wish.  Amazon gives me a small referral fee each time this happens!  In this manner you can support my books, musings, zany ads, or my adventures along the noble path known as The Way of The Man Child WITHOUT spending any more money than you were already going to!  Should you do this, I vow to send you a silent blessing, causing your genitals to adopt the optimum size, shape, smell, and death-ray attachment of choice that paralyzes your enemies with fear and envy!  Entire worlds will bow before your nether parts!  😲💪 😜  #Kindle #KindleUnlimited 


Comments

493 responses to “Check out my high school absurdical, Kor’Thank: Barbarian Valley Girl! (Yes, I know “absurdical” is a made up word)”

  1. I read this ad in its entirety just today. Those blessings are only for males though, how does that help the females? 🤔😜

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m not sure…maybe shape some parts into smiley faces or other emojis 🤣

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Seriously shape it? 😆 you can’t come up with something more exotic. 🤪…. smileys and emojis… ewww… I adore them, don’t abuse them.😀

        Liked by 1 person

      2. I don’t know…I think it would be fun being able to have my genitals be part of a nerd emoji 🥸🤣

        Like

      3. I wonder what that can be 🤔. Don’t flatter yourself tho 😜, it might not be such a hit ..

        Liked by 1 person

      4. I’m sure I can spin it into something that will amuse. I always do…😁

        Like

      5. Oh you amuse enough as it is. But an emoji is over reaching 🫣.

        Liked by 1 person

      6. You never know…help me put it together, make it look beautiful! 🤣

        Like

      7. Is that an invitation 🤔. Really beautiful, would require plenty of landscaping I guess 😉.

        Liked by 1 person

      8. Plenty of hands-on work, so to speak 🤣

        Like

      9. 😂😂😂. The hands may need help.

        Liked by 1 person

      10. I welcome it! All holes unite! 🤣

        Like

      11. 😱😱… you didn’t…

        Liked by 1 person

      12. Seriously wondering how that emoji will turn out 😇

        Liked by 1 person

      13. I’m glad it’s lurking in your imagination! 😂

        Like

      14. Yup cause I love using them, they add more playfulness 😜

        Liked by 1 person

      15. Seems like we can combine it with something else you’re interested in–two birds with one stone! 🤣

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      16. I thought you said 3, so it’s only 2 after all? 🤣

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      17. Whoops! I meant 3! 3!!! I’m usually a master of teasing, but this might be a case where I get a taste of my own medicine! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      18. That and lack of exposure😉. Meet your (international) country cousin, the mistress of tease🤣🤣.

        Liked by 1 person

      19. Good to meet you, mistress! Now let’s get busy with the three body-part solution! 😂

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      20. Why are you in a hurry? We still have to start with the socks, measurements? 😛

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      21. 5.5 inches circumference, 7 in length 🤣

        Like

      22. Where did you get this random measurement from? 🤔

        Liked by 1 person

      23. It’s easily verifiable by measuring some hands or a tongue, then comparing everything up close 🤣

        Like

      24. Too much work, might need sterilization for hygiene purposes, maybe gloves too 🤔😂

        Liked by 1 person

      25. Maybe you can be my nurse and wipe me down! 😂

        Like

      26. You know you got to fall ill for that to happen. Maybe we can start choose an illnes game 😅😮

        Liked by 1 person

      27. Nurse! I’ve bruised my groin in multiple places! I need help! NOW!!! 🤣

        Like

      28. What rubbish 🤣. Now I can see the delinquent 😂. Sorry, I’m occupied, you might have to wait a long time 😜.

        Liked by 1 person

      29. I suppose I could just massage myself back to health…but I need pictures to guide me! 🤣

        Like

      30. Do you need to publicize? What are medical mags for 😜.

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      31. I need a more personal touch 😏

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      32. It is just a measurement. Why would you need it personal 😉😇.

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      33. It’s a secret. But I’m pretty sure you’d enjoy finding out why! 🤣

        Like

      34. Now I’m dying to know 😂

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      35. Warning, it can get addictive–make sure you hydrate! 🤣

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      36. Ehhhh, again bragging 🤣. Hydrated enough, it might go to waste if not used 🫣😋😅.

        Liked by 1 person

      37. I’m ready to help you put it to use! 😁

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      38. I’m sure you would. Back to the measurements and whether the sock fits 🤣🤣.

        Liked by 1 person

      39. You’re obsessed with the sock! What about…the foot? 😏🤣

        Like

      40. The sock protects and it has to fit well. I don’t know what the foot can do

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      41. After you massage it for a bit, you might be surprised! 🤣

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      42. Why should I massage the foot, the foot? 🤣. I wonder if it can live up to the surprise you keep alluding to 😜.

        Liked by 1 person

      43. I mean…maybe it’s not a foot. Just give it a rub and see what comes out! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      44. Oh believe me I know what this foot without toes is 😅. I wonder if a genie will come out when rubbed 🤣. Can it fulfill wishes?

        Liked by 1 person

      45. Depends on what your wish is. 😏😂

        Liked by 1 person

      46. Private island again, so I can get all the massage I want 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      47. My massages get pretty addictive–you might not be able to sleep! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      48. I thought you missed this 🤭. I will believe when the wish is granted 😉. I’m beginning to wonder if that delivery is working or you even started the delivery 🤣😂

        Liked by 1 person

      49. Sometimes WP is erratic with replies or likes, it’s a bit annoying, so I’ll double check every now and then.

        I’ve been a bit busy with self-massages–I’ll have to get on that delivery! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      50. Uggghhh… seriously, you’re saying that here 🙄 🤣. We’ll talk when I see the delivery 😅.

        Liked by 1 person

      51. I mean…how much delivery do you want to see? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      52. Why? You mean to say you have a truck load 🤔🤣. Over promising much 😂

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      53. I’ve got multiple loads. There’ll be a lot of cleaning involved! 🤣

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      54. Bragging much 😅. I have yet to see the goods 🤭🤣. How can I trust there’s so much load? 😝.

        Liked by 1 person

      55. Oh I deliver on multiple levels. Not only will you see it, you’ll feel it too 😉🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      56. Your overconfidence 🤦‍♀️. First work on the delivery 🤣. That must not be working, glitches perhaps 😂.

        Liked by 1 person

      57. Sounds like you’re requesting a delivery to your door! 😉 😂

        Liked by 1 person

      58. What is delivery for then, if not door delivery 🤣 😜

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      59. Right to your door! Make sure it’s open wide so I can slide it right in! 🤣

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      60. You are nuttier than a nut 😅. Don’t count on it, the door could be rusty 😂

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      61. Just gotta put some lube on it and rub it off. 🤣

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      62. Don’t forget cobwebs too 😂. You might need tube fulls of lube. The rust has taken years 🤣.

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      63. I’m not afraid. Just means more rubbing! 🤣

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      64. Might need more work than you anticipate 😂

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      65. Or maybe less. Maybe the effect will be immediate! 😏🤣

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      66. I’m not so sure I should be that confident. You never know what lies underneath 😂.

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      67. I’m good at figuring things out. Maybe a little investigation is warranted, though 🤣

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      68. I’m not so sure an investigation would work 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      69. It’s worth trying 😏😂

        Liked by 1 person

      70. Pray how that can happen? Is that delivery or goods crossing the ocean’s? 😅

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      71. You never know! 😉

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      72. That’s the safest answer so far 🤣.

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      73. You want safe? I suspect you like a little trouble trouble…😂

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      74. You were being safe, not me 😂. So you want to trouble trouble is it? 😅😅

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      75. I’m always up for a little trouble trouble 😏😂

        Liked by 1 person

      76. Oooh, let’s trouble trouble then shall we? 🤣

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      77. How much trouble trouble are you ready for? 😁

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      78. Are you challenging trouble trouble? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      79. Let’s see how much you got 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      80. That’s for me to know and for you to find out 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      81. I’m not sure you know either…I think you might need me to help you find out yourself 😏

        Liked by 1 person

      82. Ahhh so you know what I don’t know, now trouble trouble wants to know what you know 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      83. Trouble trouble is still lurking in your mind, eh? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      84. You forgot you’re talking to trouble trouble 🤭. Trouble trouble is always lurking around 🤣

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      85. Where else is it lurking? Any body parts in particular? 🤣

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      86. I can’t tell you, where’s the fun in that then 😂. Hide and seek? 🤣

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      87. Oh I can guess 😉

        Liked by 1 person

      88. I am not going to ask, I’m scared what you’ll come up with 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      89. I’m intrigued by what YOU’D come up with 😏

        Liked by 1 person

      90. Oooh we’re playing that game is it 🤫. Still for me to know and for you NOT to find out 😂

        Liked by 1 person

      91. I don’t know…something tells me I could guess pretty accurately…🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      92. Oooh so now you’re a mind reader not pulling up the e-reader for help are we 😅

        Liked by 1 person

      93. Do I really need to read your mind? What if it’s already there for me to see? 🤣

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      94. What? You wouldn’t 🤐.. you’re that eager to see what’s inside🤣, the mind, the mind!

        Liked by 1 person

      95. Definitely eager to see what’s inside. Why don’t you show me? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      96. Sometimes, sharing is not advisable 🤣

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      97. What should we do instead? 😁

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      98. What should we not do? 😅

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      99. You want to do everything, eh? 🤣

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      100. What constitutes everything to you 🤔🤪

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      101. We’ll stop when we get tired 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      102. I’m lost here, stop what exactly 😉😂

        Liked by 1 person

      103. I’m lost as well, I guess we’ll just have to find a way to finish together 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      104. Ugghhh you!! 🤣. Already finished? Are we finishing something 🤔🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      105. I think a better question is WHO is finishing? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      106. Is this a race to see who finishes first or last🤔🤣.

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      107. I think it’s a race for me to make others finish 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      108. Ohh, that’s an unfamiliar race. Where’s the pleasure in coming second 🤣🤣

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      109. I always like to come second 🤣

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      110. Guess some rules need changing or change the game? 🤣

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      111. Nah, I’m fine with coming second. You can go first all you want! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      112. Oh OK, seems like you dislike variety or mix-up, new adventures 😂😂

        Liked by 1 person

      113. Why, do you want to change up my preference? 🤔🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      114. Ewww, you know what variety I mean, has nothing to do with preference 😂. You’re not up for playful variety 🤔🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      115. Bring on the variety! I relish a wide range of flavors! 🤣

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      116. Don’t be in such a hurry, we might have to sample a few, you know they have to complement each other 😂

        Liked by 1 person

      117. You’re right–I have a lot of things for you to taste 🤣

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      118. Sounds like you have everything ready. I need those samples then, where are they😂

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      119. Open your holes! Ear-holes, I mean 🤣

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      120. Ewww you are 🤐 🤣. Nothing is closed, you are just slow 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      121. Nothing’s closed, eh? Everything’s open for business? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      122. What, you expect business to close? How to survive then. Oh it’s not open for all though🫣 🤣

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      123. Just for me, eh? 😏🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      124. Are we ass-u-m(e)ing again? What makes you think it’s just for you 🤫 🤔 😂..

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      125. I suppose I’ll take what I can get! 🤣

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      126. You can’t say that 🤫. Exclusive, you know the bard language 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      127. The bard language seems to get me quite a bit! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      128. Oooh is it or (am I) rubbing off on you 🫣🤣. We need more bard you think?

        Liked by 1 person

      129. More bard, and more rubbing! Yes! 🤣

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      130. We have to brush up on the bard then, not sure about the rubbing 🤣

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      131. The rubbing is a crucial part! 🤣

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      132. Too much rubbing – dryness, no? 🤣. There must be alternatives 🤔

        Liked by 1 person

      133. Dryness is easily addressed. Plenty of products that can help with it! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      134. I assume you have these readily available. That’s the alternative 🤔🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      135. Gallons of it! HEH heh heh! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      136. Gallons? Where,what you need them for🤔🤣. Do we need so much 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      137. It’s quite possible! You should always have extra! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      138. I thought the original one should be enough isn’t it 🤣

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      139. I have my doubts…🤣

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      140. What? Are you saying YOU don’t have enough🤔🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      141. Well I can always produce some more, my body is a fountain! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      142. Don’t make me visualize the fountain 🫣🤣. I’m intrigued how this fountain works 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      143. It’s got a series of on off switches that are triggered by tongues! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      144. Tongues? That’s plural. How many tongues does it need? I have only one 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      145. Are you volunteering yours?? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      146. Oh oh, did I walk into that one 😅. Are you looking for a volunteer? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      147. After much consideration, I’m happy to inform you that your tongue has been accepted into our program 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      148. I wonder how much consideration that took 🤔 but only the tongue accepted, how does that work? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      149. Let’s start with the tongue, then we’ll take the other parts under consideration as well! 😁🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      150. So many steps to go through. I hope it’s worth it and not a waste of time 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      151. I think you won’t be able to stop coming back for more! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      152. I can’t stop or maybe you’d be unable to stop giving 🤔🤣

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      153. I’m definitely a giver! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      154. Oooh I’m curious what you’ll be giving🤔🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      155. I come bearing gifts! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      156. Can I peek into those ‘gifts’, plural again? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      157. You like to peek, eh? 👀🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      158. Wouldn’t you, You like suspense? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      159. I like the full view 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      160. Which full view? 🤣

        Like

      161. I’ll take the front and the rear 😋🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      162. You don’t leave much of a choice do you 🤣. I thought you’d take out parts 🫣🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      163. Why would I do that? 😏🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      164. Because there’s such a thing as fun and frolic 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      165. Well I’ll take what I can get 😏🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      166. You don’t want more? 🤔

        Liked by 1 person

      167. I’ll always want more. What are you offering? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      168. I think we’ll have to make up a menu 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      169. Make it extensive–I want a full course meal! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      170. We have to come up with it together then for a full course 🤣

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      171. It’s gonna involve big pieces of meat 🤣

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      172. Oh how big? Should not be too big or it gets wasted 🤭. What about sides? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      173. The meat will be incredibly filling. 😏🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      174. That I have to see, touch and taste 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      175. It’s fragrant and thick. You’ll love it! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      176. You’re so sure I’ll love it. Sample again, please? 🤣 wait, what fragrance 🤔

        Liked by 1 person

      177. There’s a pleasant natural musk that comes with it 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      178. I do like natural. What else is enticing and salivating? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      179. The meat itself is delectable! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      180. So you keep saying. When do I get a taste? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      181. You want a big thick bite, eh? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      182. Are you sure bite? That should not impale you 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      183. Maybe a lick, then 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      184. You sure just a lick is enough? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      185. If you’re hungry, feel free to do more than lick! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      186. I’m hungry or you are? 🤣 It better be filling and satisfaction guaranteed 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      187. You’ll be absolutely stuffed! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      188. The stuffed should not affect the next meal 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      189. Don’t worry–you’ll be repeatedly stuffed! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      190. I hope the stuffing is good 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      191. The stuffing is delicious! 😋🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      192. Now you’re being a tease, why can’t I sample? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      193. It would only make you ravenous! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      194. I would think that’s good? You wouldn’t want to curb the appetite 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      195. I definitely think it’s good. I enjoy making ladies ravenous! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      196. Sounds like one will be in constant hunger 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      197. Gotta feed that need! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      198. I’m wondering, how much feeding is required 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      199. Are you insatiable? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      200. Actually I do need to put on some weight 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      201. I can help you eat protein! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      202. You supply protein? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      203. I shoot it all over the place! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      204. I thought it requires an input and some aim 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      205. I just shoot deep and far! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      206. Hmmm, how far does it go? You’re sure you don’t need to aim? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      207. Nah, I fill it all up and slather it all over, so I hit my mark just by default! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      208. How do you know it fills up? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      209. I guess I don’t. You’ll have to do a thorough case study with me! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      210. Case studies take time. You have time to invest? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      211. Plenty of time. Be thorough! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      212. The thoroughness may need some instructions 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      213. I’ll tell you what to say! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      214. Do I need to make notes, I should not forget 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      215. You might forget in the moment. I’ll remind you. 😏🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      216. And who’ll remind you in case you forget, you know lost in the moment 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      217. I always remember. 😏🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      218. Someone needs to multitask 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      219. Multitask away! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      220. I’d need help from time to time 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      221. An extra hand, so to speak? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      222. Woah, you have an extra hand 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      223. I can lend it to you! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      224. For how long can I keep it and when do I expect it? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      225. I’m sure you’ll keep it until you wear it out! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      226. It wears out quickly? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      227. I don’t think it ever will! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      228. You don’t mind a very long term lending? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      229. You have a lot in mind, eh? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      230. You said it won’t wear out, why change 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      231. Why indeed! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      232. Unless it does not live up to its promises 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      233. It goes beyond promises. It’s magic. It grants wishes 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      234. Oh I have so many wishes and I’ve nit seen magic for years 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      235. I’ll pull a sausage out of the hat for you! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      236. Oh my gosh 🤣. You’re obsessed with sausage, isn’t there something else 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      237. Pickles and eggplants! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      238. Can you compete with the eggplant and pickles, aren’t they a little too small? 🤣

        Like

      239. We’ll have to get the overgrown ones 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      240. They might not be as tasty 🤣

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      241. Size can make up for taste, can’t it? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      242. 🤣 does it? And if it doesn’t? 🤣

        Like

      243. Just chew some flavored gum! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      244. And what hope it glues to something? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      245. The friction will make it fall off naturally! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      246. Such powerful friction eh, you’re not bragging are you? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      247. I’m sure you want to find out! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      248. What will you do then? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      249. I’d most likely study what you’re doing–I want to remember your reaction! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      250. 😱, come on, up your game 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      251. You want me to play harder, eh? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      252. Any other ways? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      253. I’ll go as hard as you like! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      254. You know your strength and intensity 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      255. I keep cocoa butter nearby just in case. Helps soothe aches and pains! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      256. It does? Which aches and pains 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      257. I guess you’ll have to just feel whatever I’m talking about! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      258. You’re teasing with aches and pains, now I’m more curious 🤣. I wonder if you’d feel the same 🤭

        Liked by 1 person

      259. I enjoy a good ache and some bruises 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      260. Bruises too? 😱. My curiosity is peaking 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      261. Go ahead and bite! I don’t mind 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      262. Be careful, I got sharp teeth, you don’t want red marks 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      263. Bring on the red marks! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      264. Don’t get too excited.You’ll need scarves or cover up 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      265. No, I like showing them off 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      266. I wonder what else you like showing off 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      267. I wonder what you’re wondering about 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      268. Ask and it shall be given? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      269. What do you ask for? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      270. For the impossible to be possible 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      271. Infinite kielbasa? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      272. You’re ready for infinite supply? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      273. If I am, what about you? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      274. I’ve got enough kielbasa to satisfy your cravings! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      275. What, you’ll always be stocked? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      276. Yep! Lotta kielbasas just hanging around! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      277. Hanging around 😱. Do I need help reaching them 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      278. Nope. It’s easily accessible! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      279. I think I got to stretch more for that accessibility 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      280. I’ll help stretch you out 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      281. As long as you don’t tear it 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      282. I’ll give you a good warm up. You’ll get a really good stretch! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      283. And what is included in this warm up? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      284. A lot of moisture! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      285. You seem to like moisture too much 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      286. We’re made from water, it’s great stuff! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      287. I guess I need a science class, specifically anatomy 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      288. I’m an experienced professor! Guaranteed A+! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      289. Oh my, you’re a professor too. Are you going to make me study very hard 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      290. There’ll be a lot of one on one tutoring! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      291. Sounds like you’ve been tutoring too much 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      292. Sounds like you haven’t been tutored enough! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      293. 😱 🤣… maybe I need refreshers 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      294. Vigorous refreshers! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      295. You may have to tone down on the vigorous, if there’s going to be plenty 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      296. I’ll try. I don’t think you’ll be able to hold back, though! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      297. Lol. You’re laying it thick. Maybe holding back could be exciting 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      298. Nah, don’t hold back 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      299. Hey, sometimes slow and steady is good? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      300. Maybe in the beginning, not for long though 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      301. Heh heh.. the imagination running riot 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      302. Your imagination is pretty active! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      303. Someone has to match yours 🤣. It was brought to life 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      304. A lot of mixing, matching, and mashing between our imaginations! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      305. Seems like your imagination has been at play 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      306. It’s always fucking around, so to speak 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      307. Ahhh well, I have to take you at your word, I wouldn’t know 🫣🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      308. You’d like to, though! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      309. To know? I bet you would 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      310. Oh I’d love to! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      311. I’ve a badass response but have to censor it 🤣.. let’s get to the know part 🤣.

        Liked by 1 person

      312. To feel is to know! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      313. You’ll help me feel 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      314. I can give you lessons! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      315. I’ve been waiting for those lessons 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      316. What if you don’t do well? Are you ready for a spanking? 👀🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      317. I’m sure you’d like me not to do well when there’s punishment involved 🫣🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      318. Maybe you’d do poorly on purpose! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      319. That depends on what punishment you give 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      320. I mean we already mentioned spanking…🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      321. I thought there’d be a few more besides spanking 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      322. Like biting? Scratching? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      323. Yeah those too. I’m sure you’ll come up with a few more, or something new 🤔🤣.

        Liked by 1 person

      324. I feel like it’s captured your interest! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      325. What do you think? What else you got? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      326. I used to play piano–I’m good with my fingers! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      327. Ooh, I’m curious what else they’re good for 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      328. You want me to play you like a piano?🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      329. Do you think you can find the right keys, chords? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      330. Indeed! I’ll make you sing! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      331. You’d need to fine tune the keys first 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      332. I’ll have to root around to make sure everything’s in tune! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      333. It does need a lot of tuning, I hope you have patience 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      334. I’ll hit all the right chords! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      335. You sure you don’t need practice first? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      336. You’re right–let me practice on you! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      337. Not rusted are you? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      338. You should check! Be ready to apply lube! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      339. The lube for me or you? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      340. Let’s do both! Cover all the bases! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      341. You better stock up 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      342. You’ll be slick and slippery! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      343. That’ll depend on the supply 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      344. I aim on drenching you! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      345. I’m curious about the ‘aim’ whether it works 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      346. Not much aim needed, actually–there’s a ton of spraying! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      347. Like the toy jet sprays 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      348. Looking forward to my spray? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      349. I’m not sure but I’m curious about the spray 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      350. You want to feel it on you? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      351. Somethings have to be felt to believe? 🤣. You like this ‘feeling’ isn’t it 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      352. I think you’d like it as well! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      353. Who doesn’t like to feel. How do I get this feeling 🤔🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      354. Practice with kielbasas 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      355. Are they your favorite 🤔🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      356. I just want you to be prepared 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      357. Groundwork laid out 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      358. I’ll lay out more than the groundwork 😏🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      359. You will dig then pave too? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      360. There will be a lot of jackhammering! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      361. Sounds like too much hammering, are you sure there’s no destruction 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      362. Nothing a good night’s sleep won’t fix. But I wonder if you wouldn’t want more jackhammering throughout the night! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      363. Oh you wild nut 🤣. Depends on the size of the hammer 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      364. It’s a kielbasa-sized, kielbasa-shaped hammer! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      365. Now I know what to gift you…kielbasa wrapped in…. it seems to be your favorite 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      366. Gift it to yourself! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      367. I don’t mind but I doubt it compares to the real 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      368. It definitely doesn’t. Maybe warm it up and fill it with cream? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      369. Oh gosh 🤣. But I don’t like cream 🤣 and why warm? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      370. My cream is special! You’ll love it! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      371. How will I know how special it is 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      372. I’ll make funny noises–that’s your confirmation! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      373. Not Mac and cheese 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      374. YOU will make the mac and cheese noises! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      375. I will 🤔 I cannot imagine 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      376. Shlorpa-shlorp shlorp! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      377. Oh you nut 🤣 you make those noises huh 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      378. We’ll both make them 😏🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      379. Not the Mac and cheese ones, hopefully 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      380. It’s going to sound like a mac and cheese tornado 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      381. You can make a tornado too, not just quake? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      382. It’ll end with a big juicy flood 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      383. Oh my gosh, flood too? What can you not do? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      384. Sometimes, I’m unable to summon two floods in a row 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      385. Otherwise it happens? 😱 You must be a god. 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      386. I mean, I have been called that in the heat of the moment…🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      387. Hahaha! I knew you’d say that. There is heat as well? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      388. Heat, moisture, friction…it’s a trifecta! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      389. Sounds like you can cause a volcanic eruption 🫣🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      390. I am pretty hot 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      391. I don’t want to melt then 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      392. You’ll definitely leak 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      393. How do we stop that? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      394. Should I plug it? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      395. 😱, not sure that’ll work 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      396. Let’s give it a try! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      397. Lol! Tell me how that works 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      398. You have to participate. Remember who’s getting plugged 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      399. Nut! 🤣 I wonder if it’s as easy as you make it sound 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      400. Getting plugged? It may be tight and uncomfortable at first…🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      401. 🤣😱 you like tight? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      402. Tight is great! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      403. I’m wondering if there are alternative plugging 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      404. You want to be plugged in multiple places? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      405. 🤫🤣 I’m not sure what multiple places. I’m wondering if the main thing would plug well 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      406. You’re looking forward to the main plug, eh? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      407. 🤫. If that doesn’t work nothing else will work 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      408. We could try plugging alternatives, just to be sure 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      409. Which alternatives? Would they be better than the real one? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      410. We could plug them in a rhythm: bloop bloop…bloop-bloop! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      411. Oh you crazy nut 🤣. You’re peaking my curiosity, sound effects too 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      412. Start with stirring the mac n cheese, do it faster and faster, than rhythmically slap your thigh and accompany it with grunting 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      413. That is a lot of details to follow, why so complicated? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      414. Maybe you could try playing some moist bagpipes 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      415. Oh my goodness, where can I get moist bagpipes? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      416. You want my bagpipe? I’ll moisten it for you! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      417. You’re giving it away? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      418. You can have it free of charge! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      419. Oh my gosh, that’s so generous of you. How will you deliver? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      420. I will deliver it vigorously and forcefully! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      421. 🫣 the force and vigor should not damage it 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      422. I think it will do the opposite–awaken and rejuvenate! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      423. Rejuvenation is good for skin 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      424. I’ll rejuvenate everything, inside and out! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      425. It helps dryness? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      426. Do you need to be moistened? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      427. Extra moisturizing is always welcome 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      428. I will happily moisturize you! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      429. Obviously it can’t be done in a sad manner 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      430. What about in a frantic and aggressive manner? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      431. You can make that a possibility too? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      432. I feel like you’ll match my franticness and aggressiveness 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      433. Your imagination is running riot 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      434. Isn’t yours? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      435. I am very simple 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      436. Animalistic? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      437. What? How did you read animalistic from simple? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      438. Aren’t animals simple? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      439. You say I’m a simple animal? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      440. At certain times, yes 😏🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      441. What? And at other times?

        Liked by 1 person

      442. Other times, you lie about it and say you’re not 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      443. How do you know I lie? I am such an innocent 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      444. Are you, though? 🤔🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      445. You want me to convince you of my angelic attributes? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      446. Will you be on your knees? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      447. 🫣🫣… folded hands 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      448. Get on your knees, fold your hands in your lap, and I’ll take care of the rest 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      449. Oh I thought you want me with folded hands 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      450. You can do what you want with your hands 😏🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      451. Oh, so you don’t want my hands folding….🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      452. You can start out that way if you want 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      453. Oooh you’re saying I have a head start 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      454. If you want to start with the head, that’s fine by me 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      455. I guess we’d have to sample what works best 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      456. Sample away! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      457. I’m ready but where is it? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      458. You’re thirsting for it, eh? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      459. Am I thirsty or curious? you’re quenching the thirst? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      460. I’ll quench you repeatedly 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      461. You won’t run out or dry out? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      462. I’ll recharge in my sleep! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      463. I wonder how much that works 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      464. You’ll have to drain me to find out 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      465. What? Drain you and then fill you up again 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      466. Do it with your mouth! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      467. 😱 that is so demanding 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      468. I can demand a lot more 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      469. I can take a wild guess what those demands could be 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      470. Shlorpa-shlorp-shlorp! Stir the mac and cheese! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      471. The mac and cheese is giving me ideas 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      472. Put your ear up to it as you stir it, so you can really drink in the sound 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      473. Oh my goodness. Why drink the sound when it can something else 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      474. What do you want to drink? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      475. I don’t think you offer variety 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      476. You’re right. It’s just straight vanilla 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      477. I wonder if we can add some toppings 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      478. You want to be a topping? Get on top! 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      479. What? I didn’t say that 😱🤣. But you’d like it huh 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      480. It would be a great ride 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      481. Do I need riding lessons? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      482. I can give you riding lessons 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      483. You know how to tame wild …? 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      484. I’ll let you buck and thrash for a bit. I enjoy the wildness 🤣

        Liked by 1 person

      485. Scratching and clawing not withstanding 🤣

        Like

      486. Oops that sounds bad doesn’t it 😬 🤦‍♀️

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Wait, what did just happen here? 🙃

    Liked by 1 person

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