What the Ghost of Man Whore Past is happening, all you aged-out dickslingers who are now decrepit old fuckbags who plague the gym locker rooms with your sloppy-ass balls and liver-spotted frenulum, you think youโ€™ve put your checkered past behind you but as you lie in bed, the specters of cervixes, rectums, and tonsils haunt you and tickle your decades-wasted penis, you sob into your pillow and tell them to leave, goddammit, just leave me the hell alone but they refuse to stop fucking with you so you lose your shit and run through your house while blasting sperm into every crevice and corner telling them to take it, just fucking take it and GO THE FUCK AWAYโ€”

Damn, dude, go to the nursing home and sell that wiener!  Donโ€™t you know STDs run rampant among the elder folk because theyโ€™re sick of bingo and mashed potatoes?  Thereโ€™s plenty of opportunity for youโ€”sheesh!

Anyways, now that Iโ€™ve got your attention, let me direct it towards my various-genred books!  First up is my YA fantasy:  A Door into Evermoor.  If youโ€™re hankering for some psychedelic high school fun with a giant side of interdimensional monsters and teen genius hijinks, check out Korโ€™Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl!  If you want a big olโ€™ helping of robot vs. wizard pew pew, along with an extra serving of existential philosophy, check out my science fiction series Echo!  And donโ€™t forget to leave a positive review for them!  Positive reviewsโ€”even though they only take a minute or two of your timeโ€”are like $1000 tips for us indie authors.  Every one of them is SUPER appreciated!  #Kindle #KindleUnlimited #writingcommunity #writer #booktok #writerscommunity #writing

๐Ÿ™‚ ๐Ÿ™‚ ๐Ÿ˜€


Comments

10 responses to “Give my books a read and a review!”

  1. C. Derick Miller Avatar
    C. Derick Miller

    I’m sold!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you! ๐Ÿ™Œ

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  2. Aging and sexโ€ฆavoided thinking about it as I watched my own mom become a cougar for a periodโ€ฆbut it is inevitableโ€ฆ Do you know what they call a cougar with hearing aids? โ€ฆ. Wait for itโ€ฆ a def leopard. ๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿคฃ ( I totally stole that from a meme!)

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    1. I should try that at cougar bars. There’s definite interest (or inebriation) if they smile or laugh! ๐Ÿคฃ

      Liked by 1 person

      1. ๐Ÿคฃ โ€ฆwait, there is such a thing as cougar bars? Guess Iโ€™m too young to know about such things!!โ€™ ๐Ÿ˜‡

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      2. Mostly just by reputation. There were, however, official cougar cruises, but I think they dwindled away. Not that I looked into it…๐Ÿ˜…

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  3. “Psychedelic high school fun with a giant side of interdimensional monsters and teen genius hijinks”? “A big olโ€™ helping of robot vs. wizard pew pew, along with an extra serving of existential philosophy”? Certainly sounds as if it should be up my street.

    Now if only I can get over a couple of hangups, one being a feeling that a book isn’t really a book unless trees had to die first to make it, the other being the morbid fear of Jeff Bezos getting even richer…

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  4. It’s trough that the retirements homes are dens of lust and depravity.

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    1. They inspire me, lol!

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