Echo: A Dystopian Science Fiction Novel

There comes a time in every author’s life when he has to withdraw his engorged cock from the meticulously cut hole he’s carved into a microwave-heated watermelon, wipe the globs of week-old cocoa butter off his pendulous scrotum, peel the electro-shock pads off the quivering surface off his overstimulated taint, and get to work.  This is the point where the initial honeymoon of novelty-rich drafting has given way to an unending abyss of procrastination and excuses, the point where it’s become unmistakably clear that it’s time to get off my ass and get back to work.

I’ve been staring at my half-finished manuscript for over an hour, my gigantic dick hanging limply down between my ankles.  The monotonous whir of a ceiling fan drones on in the background, interrupted every now and then by a lone cricket.

Fuck.  FUCK.  FUCK!  I hate you, you unfinished piece-of-shit draft—I HATE you!!!  You’re like a spike-covered shit that’s magically grown a mouth and is using it to laugh raucously at me while you dilate my butthole to new, unheard of widths! 

NYAAAAAHHHH!!!!

I run around my studio, gibbering wildly and flailing at the air.  “ARGLE BARGLE GLOP GLIF!  RUBBA DUBBA AHIBIDIBOO!”  Semi-intelligible syllables give way to a series of manically voiced motorboat sounds, interspersed with nonsensical Old Man Noises.

Finally, I crumple to the floor, utterly exhausted.  My eyes settle onto my eReader. 

Damn, the answer was lying in front of me the whole time.  I open it to Echo, activating its reality distortion powers.  Magic flash.

Time freezes.  An angelic figure materializes before me, limned by a mote-flecked aura of incandescent light.

“Soccer Mom Prime,” I whisper.  “Are you here to get rid of my writer’s block?”

“I am.”  She smiles and floats toward me.  “But it’ll require courage, Kent.  Are you sure you want this?”

My voice grows firm.  “I do.”

She fakes me out with a jab that doesn’t connect; it’s meant to blind me and set up her cross, which comes shooting into my gaping mouth.  As her fingers slip out, I realize she’s stuffed a heroic dose of magic mushrooms into my suck-hole.  Before I can say a word, she drops to her knees and begins orally pleasuring me.  At the same time, she places a finger onto my butt-pucker.

“No!” I squeal.  “Exit only, EXIT ON—”

Then she jams a pair of them in, three knuckles deep.

“AAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!”  I’m flooded with an onslaught of premises and ideas.

What the FUCK!  I’m so conflicted!  Jesus Christ—the things I’ve gotta do to get rid of writer’s block.  Shaking my head.  Shaking my FUCKING head.

Are you willing to go to any lengths necessary to crank out your book?  Echo’s what you need!  Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here:  Vol. 1 on Kindle.  Vol. 2 on Kindle here:  Vol.2 on Kindle  Vol. 3 on Kindle here:  Vol. 3 on Kindle  Vol.4 on Kindle here:  Vol. 4 on Kindle  Echo Omnibus here:  Echo Omnibus  Echo Vol. 1 & 2 Combined Edition here:  Combined Edition  If you wanna hear me babble on about anything and everything, and strain my FREAKIN’ BRAIN, then here’s a link to my podcast:  Strained Brains!  It is on iTunes, Stitcher, Spotify, and Google Play!  Please give it a listen and a five-star review!  Here’s the miscellaneous gear that I use to try and become an uber-human:  Optimization, and last but not least, my buddy Jumar Balacy has made a supercool microsite at kentwaynebrain.com!  Go check out his computer-based wizardry  🙂 🙂 😀

Hold on!  I just got approved to be an Amazon affiliate!  If you’re going to buy ANY product from Amazon, and you’d like to support my efforts for absolutely free, then simply click on one of the Echo links I’ve provided—they’ll send you to Echo’s Amazon page—and THEN buy whatever product you wish.  Amazon gives me a small referral fee each time this happens!  In this manner you can support my books, musings, podcast, zany ads, or my adventures along the noble path known as The Way of The Man Child WITHOUT spending any more money than you were already going to!  Should you do this, I vow to send you a silent blessing, causing your genitals to adopt the optimum size, shape, smell, and death-ray attachment of choice that paralyzes your enemies with fear and envy!  Entire worlds will bow before your nether parts!  😲💪 😜