What the rescue-cock is happening, all you wrongly accused meatslingers who’ve been framed by sinister parties and find yourself in court as the judge summarizes why you’re legally fucked, after which they lower their spectacles, look over the brim at you and ask if you have anything to say, sweat beads across your brow, how the fuck did it come to this, then in a sudden burst of inspiration and rage you whip your summer-sausage penis onto the table—ka-THUNK—as a defiant reply to their pathetic arguments, the room bursts into chaos, a riot breaks out, the judge hammers with their gavel and screams for order, bailiffs move in to detain you but you twist your hips and crack a skull with your dick, jab the other one’s eye, grab one of their necks from behind as your giant wiener quivers before their face ready to inflict a horrific skullfucking, you scream back, BACK MOTHERFUCKERS, and edge toward the exit with your newfound hostage, it’s time to go full-on action movie and embark on a harrowing quest to apprehend the real villain and clear your fucking name—
And THAT, my friends, is why you pick your friends carefully! Who knows if your so-called buddy—the very same one who’s joking around with you in the opening scene while secretly giving you dirty narrow-eyed looks—is plotting to frame you and try to steal your girl while you’re rotting in prison? Fuck that guy!
Anyways, now that I’ve got your attention, let me direct it towards my various-genred books! First up is my YA fantasy series, the Unbound Realm. Volume 1 is A Door into Evermoor. Paperback here: A Door into Evermoor, paperback. I’ve just published volume 2: Weapons of Old If you’re hankering for some psychedelic high school fun with a giant side of interdimensional monsters and teen genius hijinks, check out Kor’Thank: Barbarian Valley Girl! If you want a big ol’ helping of robot vs. wizard pew pew, along with an extra serving of existential philosophy, check out my science fiction series Echo! And don’t forget to leave a positive review for them! Positive reviews—even though they only take a minute or two of your time—are like $1000 tips for us indie authors. Every one of them is SUPER appreciated! #Kindle #KindleUnlimited #writingcommunity #writer #booktok #writerscommunity #writing
🙂 🙂 😀
Dirty Sci-Fi Buddha 
😂😂😂 good lord where does a girl find herself one of those skullcracking cocks?! 😳
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There’s one here in San Diego, but it seemingly has a mind of its own. 🤣 I have to choke the shit out of it so it doesn’t stand up at inappropriate moments😂
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Damn and you mean to tell me that I used to live a roadtrip away from it!! Now it will take a couple plane rides to come help you choke it. I am so disappointed.
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Maybe our paths will cross, I’ll just throw that out into the aether and we’ll see what happens. But I could definitely use your help, this thing is constantly raging, it needs to be disciplined! 😂 Spit on it and smother it, make it toil in dark humid conditions until it vomits and goes back to sleep! 🤣
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I hope our paths do cross. You’ve been reading about my dirty secrets for quite a now.
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If/when we meet, I hope I can live up to your fantasies! I’m vanilla, but on the enthusiastic and spicy side 😅 Being present and feeling the vibe is more important to me than 50 shades craziness
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You only think your vanilla cause you haven’t tried strawberry flavoured yet 😉🤭 but you know I could cook up 50 shades of vanilla dishes for you if you want … I think we’ve got the living in the moment and vibe thing successfully orchestrated
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I’m ready to expand my repertoire! 😏 I typically mix in biting, smacking, squeezing, pinching, but I really just do spicy variations of the basics. Show me that strawberry! 🤣
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The strawberry is all that plus entwining our souls and taking it to a higher vibratory level. I’ll see if I can put it into words and write something….
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I’ve never craved strawberries this much! 😉
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the whiplash i got reading this
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