What the dick-lips are happening, all you folks who happen to be looking at a sleeping wiener when it suddenly rears up and snarls in a beat-your-ass tone (take your pick between New Yawk mobster, backwoods mutant-adjacent overalls-wearing hillbilly, or Clint from Gran Torino after his hemorrhoids explode and spontaneously catch fire) “What the FUCK are you looking at, you full-human piece of penis-hating shit?”  To which you hastily raise your hands and babble that no, you love all womb-hammers, where did it get the idea that—and it cuts you off, demanding it??  IT???  As it castigates you for being an anti-penile shithead, it winds around your neck and begins choking the life out of you, holy fuck it’s like a gigantic veiny smelly anaconda, dear Batman in Gotham I need a Hail Mary save, vision’s going black and starting to collapse—

Low-down fuckbrained wiener-possessing demons!  That’s why no one’s earned my vote—our candidates aren’t standing up to these cock-ruling fiends!

Anyways, now that I’ve got your attention, let me direct it towards my various-genred books!  First up is my YA fantasy series, the Unbound Realm.  Volume 1 is A Door into Evermoor.  I’ve just published volume 2:  Weapons of Old  If you’re hankering for some psychedelic high school fun with a giant side of interdimensional monsters and teen genius hijinks, check out Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl!  If you want a big ol’ helping of robot vs. wizard pew pew, along with an extra serving of existential philosophy, check out my science fiction series Echo!  And don’t forget to leave a positive review for them!  Positive reviews—even though they only take a minute or two of your time—are like $1000 tips for us indie authors.  Every one of them is SUPER appreciated!  #Kindle #KindleUnlimited #writingcommunity #writer #booktok #writerscommunity #writing

🙂 🙂 😀