What the cock-snare is happening, all you meat-swingers who’ve gotten careless with your pocket-vajeen booby trap inspections and unwittingly stuck your womb-hammer into the rubbery aperture, only to have a display on its shaft light up with the image of that creepy clown-villain from Saw who goes on to inform you that you have 5 minutes left to make your escape, pressurized gas ejects from the sides as evil-sounding gears start grinding and clicking, SWAT busts in and struggles not to laugh as their master defuser-guys disassemble the top layer of the fleshlight and expose a bevy of wires and circuits, between badly suppressed chuckles they start arguing about blue wire/red wire you’re just like CUT EM ALL GODDAMMIT WE’RE RUNNING OUT OF TIME—

And THAT, my friends, is why you always check the pocket-p for wiener-trapping mechanisms!  Unless you’ve got some Macgyver-level skill at defusing cutting-edge dick-snares, you gotta check them jawns for nefarious devices!

Anyways, now that I’ve got your attention, let me direct it towards my various-genred books!  First up is my YA fantasy series, the Unbound Realm.  Volume 1 is A Door into Evermoor.  I’ve just published volume 2:  Weapons of Old  If you’re hankering for some psychedelic high school fun with a giant side of interdimensional monsters and teen genius hijinks, check out Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl!  If you want a big ol’ helping of robot vs. wizard pew pew, along with an extra serving of existential philosophy, check out my science fiction series Echo!  And don’t forget to leave a positive review for them!  Positive reviews—even though they only take a minute or two of your time—are like $1000 tips for us indie authors.  Every one of them is SUPER appreciated!  #Kindle #KindleUnlimited #writingcommunity #writer #booktok #writerscommunity #writing

🙂 🙂 😀