What the holi-dick is happening, all you adventurous revelers who like to mash nethers dressed in an eye-catching costume and decide to carry it forward to a vigorous hole-widening after a Thanksgiving feast, only to realize too little too late that as you’re thrusting away with a full belly this is the opposite of sexy and should be restricted to Halloween only, vomit and tears are seeping from your mouth and your eyes, Jesus H fistfucking Christ you’re so fucking full it feels like tiny goblins are punching the insides of your colon and anus, trying to bust out but you gotta keep going because if Han Solo made the Kessel Run in less than twelve parsecs, there’s a snowball’s chance you might be able to get your nut before your cheeks give out and all hell breaks loose from your overpressured butthole—

Come on, man, you should’ve learned this in Sex 101!  Never, EVER get your shlorp on after a giant-ass meal—FUCK the Kessel Run!

Anyways, now that I’ve got your attention, let me direct it towards my various-genred books!  First up is my YA fantasy series, the Unbound Realm.  Volume 1 is A Door into Evermoor.  I’ve just published volume 2:  Weapons of Old  If you’re hankering for some psychedelic high school fun with a giant side of interdimensional monsters and teen genius hijinks, check out Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl!  If you want a big ol’ helping of robot vs. wizard pew pew, along with an extra serving of existential philosophy, check out my science fiction series Echo!  And don’t forget to leave a positive review for them!  Positive reviews—even though they only take a minute or two of your time—are like $1000 tips for us indie authors.  Every one of them is SUPER appreciated!  #Kindle #KindleUnlimited #writingcommunity #writer #booktok #writerscommunity #writing

🙂 🙂 😀