Muttocks, a terrier I have known since we were pups, bows deeply as I walk into the foyer of the hidden Terrier fortress that goes by the name of Lyโu Aedra.ย โLord Bitefighter; long has it been since weโve seen you grace these halls.ย You are most welcome in the Palace of Mustache.โ
I nod accordingly.ย โMy assignment with the Two-legs Kent Wayne has kept me quite busy.ย While he is a sweet and loving human, the overly muscled goof is a bit daffy by nature.โย My mustached lips curl up in a smile as my mind flickers to the humorous shenanigans that Kent cannot help but engage in when left to his own devices.
We trot along in silence for awhile and enter the Chamber of Biscuits, where the Council of Elders gathers to make important decisions regarding the fate of all canines.ย Twelve gray-faced dogs give me grave looks as I walk to the center of the stone circle ringed by their elevated seats.ย I lift my tiny paw to my snout and give the Elders a Terrier salute.ย Muttocks does the same.
โGreetings, Bitefighter.ย Greetings, Muttocks.ย We are honored by your presence.ย Muttocks, you may depart.โย He nods at my friend.
Muttocks salutes again and trots away.
I say, โI am honored to be here, Elder Rex.ย Why have you summoned me?โ
Rex sighs.ย โA matter of grave import.ย As you know, our forces have been locked in battle with the Felinesโโ
My ears perk up.ย โYes Elder.ย I have several direct action and sabotage offensives planned against them in the near future.ย It wonโt be long before those fish-eatersโโ
Rex cuts me off with a dismissive wave.ย โToo little too late, Bitefighter.ย The council has decided to ally with the chihuahuas.โ
I close my eyes and quietly say, โDonโt.ย Donโt tell me weโve become friends with those cursed not-dogs.โย When I open my eyes I see regret etched deep into Rexโs whiskered face.
โWe had no choice.ย They arrived right before you did.ย Iโm sorry.โ
I watch in disbelief as red-cloaked chihuahuas march into the Hall, their evil lips drawn back into tiny rictuses.
I lock eyes with Rex as they stand me up on my hind legs and restrain my forepaws.ย โIโm sorry too.โ
Rex says, โYouโll be frozen in carbonate and sold to the highest bidder.ย Itโs a pity it had to end this way, Bitefighter.ย This is for the good of all of Lyโu Aedra.โ
I know how this ends.ย Kent Wayne is a staunch devotee of the silly human fable called โStar Wars.โย I shake my head and reply, โNo, Rex.ย No good will come ofย allying with not-dogs.ย You have lost your honor.ย You no longer deserve to wear the mustache of a Terrier Bite Monk.ย Wolvesโ balls, you donโt deserve to even call yourself a Terrier.โ
Rexโs eyes flash with rage.ย โIโm more Terrier than youโll EVER be!ย Guards!ย Take him away!โ
Only one option left.ย I kick free of the chihuahuas holding my limbs, reach into my utility belt, and open an eReader to Echo.ย Magic flash.
โDoggy doggy doggy!ย So CUTE!โย A mascara-lined eye looks in through the entrance of the Hall of Biscuits, then a pink-nailed hand reaches in and fumbles around, causing the entire gathering of dogs to erupt in terror.
One of the chihuahuas screams, โTweenagers!ย RUN!โ
The gathering erupts in panic.ย The plastic ceiling of our dog-chamber (made by Tyco or HasbroโI cannot remember which at the moment) lifts up and four giant tweenage girls stare down at us, their glitter-dotted faces smiling in avarice.ย They begin scooping up chihuahuas and terriers and putting them in their purses.ย I nimbly evade a pair of grasping hands and beat a hasty retreat.ย As I do so, I see Rex getting scooped up by one of the girls, whoโs commenting how cute he would look with bow-ties in his hair.ย He stretches a paw toward me and screams.
โBITEFIGHTER!ย You canโt leave me here!ย You’re not thatย cruel!โ
Taking a cue from my crude yet amusing sapien companion Kent Wayne, I raise the middle digit of my right forepaw and flick off Rex.ย Simultaneously, I yell, โSuck it, Old-balls!ย I hope you get snipped!โย Then I beat a hasty retreat.ย Thereโs cats to fight, pizza to steal, and goofy bastards named Kent Wayne to snuggle with.ย Terriers Eternus!
If you ever find that youโre a consummate Terrier warrior whoโs about to be betrayed like Han was at Bespin, then save your bacon by utilizing the magic, tweenager-summoning properties of Echo! ย Getย Echo Vol. 1 on Kindleย here: ย Vol. 1 on Kindle. ย Vol. 2 on Kindle here: ย Vol.2 on Kindleย Vol. 3 on Kindle here: ย Vol. 3 on Kindleย #kindle #kindleunlimited


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