What the math-boner is going on, all my fellow horn-dogs who’ve had to exercise unprecedented levels of discipline as you struggle to understand quadratic equations and polynomials when all you really wanna do is sink into a primitive monkey-crouch atop your bed and starch your sheets with a furious-handed e-jac? This is just an afternoon reminder to grab yerselves a copy of Echo and download you some episodes of the Strained Brains podcast! (And to leave a positive review for them as well! 🙂 ) Calm down, calm down: neither Echo nor my podcast are about blasting out some home-made rubber-cement (with a tinge of asparagus, for all of us who’ve been blessed with an extra touch of Don’t Give a Fuck); no effin’ way! Echo’s all about cyborg-ian pew pew, dark socioeconomic commentary, hairy faced rowr-beasts, and beautiful future wizards! Also, if you’ve read any of my books, please remember to leave a positive review for them on Amazon. Amazon reviews only takes a minute of your time, and you don’t need to have made a “verified purchase” in order to make them; you only need an Amazon account (in case you read my stuff through Kindle Unlimited or other means). To give you an idea of how febreze-fresh amazing positive Amazon reviews are to us indie authors, imagine this: you’re babysitting your neighbor’s two-year old spawn, who’s sitting there digging away for green gold in his right nostril. Your eyes narrow in disgust as he pulls out a stringy one and jams it into his demonic face-hole. You turn your back, covering your mouth to suppress your rising vomit, but then you feel a tiny finger brush your calf. You look down in horror as you realize the goddamn booger-eater’s just touched you with a microbe-laden digit.
“Goo!” he exclaims, smiling widely.
FUCK! Green-glowing tendrils of rad-resistant bacteria start crawling up your thigh. You run to the garage, grab a hatchet with trembling hands, ready to cut off your leg before you’re transformed into a creature from the annals of your nightmares. Before you can bring the hatchet down, a hand grabs your wrist, stopping it in its tracks.
You lock eyes with an iridescent being who’s composed of your favorite porn-stars—its face flashes through dozens of Oral Masters in the span of a second—and gape in awe. The porn-angel lowers a glimmering hand to your thigh, and a blast of radiance funnels through its arm and into your leg, healing it of disgusting child-goo. YES! See, that rush of relief you’d feel at being healed by a celestial porn-composite is EXACTLY what we indie author/podcasters feel when we get a positive review on Amazon or iTunes! So do your favorite indie author/podcaster (and perennial Man Child) Kent Wayne a bonafide, porn-ified favor and leave him a positive review on the ’Zons or the ’Tunes! Thank You All and have a Good and Chill Night!!! 🙂 🙂 😀
Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here: Vol. 1 on Kindle. Vol. 2 on Kindle here: Vol.2 on Kindle Vol. 3 on Kindle here: Vol. 3 on Kindle Vol.4 on Kindle here: Vol. 4 on Kindle Echo Omnibus here: Echo Omnibus Echo Vol. 1 & 2 Combined Edition here: Combined Edition If you wanna hear me babble on about anything and everything, and strain my FREAKIN’ BRAIN, then here’s a link to my podcast: Strained Brains! It is on iTunes, Stitcher, Spotify, and Google Play! Please give it a listen and a five-star review! Here’s the miscellaneous gear that I use to try and become an uber-human: Optimization, and last but not least, my buddy Jumar Balacy has made a supercool microsite at kentwaynebrain.com! Go check out his computer-based wizardry 🙂 🙂 😀
Hold on! I just got approved to be an Amazon affiliate! If you’re going to buy ANY product from Amazon, and you’d like to support my efforts for absolutely free, then simply click on one of the Echo links I’ve provided—they’ll send you to Echo’s Amazon page—and THEN buy whatever product you wish. Amazon gives me a small referral fee each time this happens! In this manner you can support my books, musings, podcast, zany ads, or my adventures along the noble path known as The Way of The Man Child WITHOUT spending any more money than you were already going to! Should you do this, I vow to send you a silent blessing, causing your genitals to adopt the optimum size, shape, smell, and death-ray attachment of choice that paralyzes your enemies with fear and envy! Entire worlds will bow before your nether parts! 😲💪 😜