Writing snobs have taken over the world. ย I’m being rolled through the streets in stockades, like William F’in Wallace. ย An angry, bespectacled academic waves a red pen at me, shouting and screaming about proper grammar. ย Others are clicking their staplers, showering me with staples, howling about how the proper staple should be set one inch from the border of the paper at a 45 degree angle. ย In the crowd, I see my loyal 10 lb. terrier, Bitefighter, charging toward me with my eReader. ย He spits it out and it opens to Echo. ย Magic flash. ย The streets begin booming with giant footsteps. ย I turn my head to the side and see a giant, Stay Puft Hemingway trundling through the skyline. ย He turns his massive, mustachioed head to either side and roars, “HEM-ING-WAY!” ย Writing snobs run to him, creaming their pants, tearfully requesting he read their manuscripts. ย He looks down, his face twists in disgust, and he squishes the first bunch with a giant foot. ย Guts and bones crunch together, mingling into a stew of mashed geek-dom. ย The rest of the snobs turn and run, screaming in terror. ย He laughs evilly, “HO HO HO! ย FILTHY NERDS!” ย He reaches down, grabs a handful, and begins maowing ’em down. ย I’m being splashed by brains and innards, and I’m laughing my ass off.
There will be a time when stick-up-the-butt idiots put you in stockades. ย When that time comes, be ready. ย HEM-ING-WAY. ย Getย Echo Vol. 1 on Kindleย here: ย Vol. 1 on Kindle. ย Vol. 2 on Kindle here: ย Vol.2 on Kindle


Leave a reply to finnegandaley Cancel reply