I’m surfing with my life-vested 10lb. terrier buddy Bitefighter. He’s happy as a clam, panting and smiling into the salt-threaded wind. We’re paddling out, enjoying the clear, sun-dappled waves, when suddenly, I look down and see an army of blank-eyed stares. As crazy as it may seem, a horde of Chihuahuas is swimming below us. All of ’em are giving us those weird, fish-eyed gazes. I’m a little creeped out. Then—one by one—their eyes light red. Tiny lips peel back—each one’s maw is lined with a triple row of teeth (Ha! I KNEW they weren’t real dogs!). The little demonites swarm toward me and Bitefighter, arrowing through the water like eely rockets. I open my waterproofed phone’s Kindle app to Echo. Magic flash. Macgyver appears on my surfboard. I wave my arms for balance as he reaches in his pocket and pulls out a fistful of paperclips. “WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?” I yell. His hands work in a furious scramble, and suddenly, there’s a rough-looking but serviceable outboard motor on the back of my board. He locks eyes with me and says, “Hang on to something.” He flicks a switch, then suddenly we’re zipping away. The Chihuahua horde is chasing us. Me and Bitefighter are down low, clinging to the edges of the board. Macgyver smacks the engine. A double-barreled ion repeater springs from its top and he sits back and presses the butterfly switch. Bright swaths of turbolasers streak out from the surfboard, blasting apart the army of pursuing demonites.
3.8% of all surfing deaths are caused by a horde of amphibious, demonite Chihuahuas. Have a Macgyver at the ready. Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here: Vol. 1 on Kindle. Vol. 2 on Kindle here: Vol.2 on Kindle