I used to think I had to nag and berate myself in order to perform, but then I observed folks who were great performers and positive-minded. I realized I’d rather aim for that, then be upheld as a tortured example of outward excellence–internally stuck in discontent, insecurity, and the constant temptation to put others down (because of a scarcity-minded view that asserts people can’t simultaneously be positive and productive, and that I’m serving a greater good by dragging them into negativity so they’ll work harder to avoid it). I’ll leave that up to them, if they want to adopt that view and that path. I’ve come to believe that at the base of life, there’s a more pleasant premise.
Dirty Sci-Fi Buddha 
A step necessary if you want to become a master at what you do.
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I constantly hold myself in view of many dialects, philosophies, even scriptures of many to even religious nation. “To Live is to Suffer” is a blatant translation of the first dialect of Buddhism to initiate the onward transgression of achieving Shcmochka or “Karmic Balance.” In my life, I’ve had this outwardly cynical and nihilistic view to the world, keeping my own without-fuel optimism and reality in check to sway others elsewhere. Perhaps my own way of clawing others towards negativity to find some sort of “Strength in Adversity.” I hold this deeply true, even in English which is not my native language. Though I guess upon more translations to my knowledge “To Live is To Suffer” via Tibetan Mockshauseorro or Cantonese Xiajiang (Mandarin didn’t exist around the time The Eight Fold Path came about in Buddhist teachings, nor any derivative of Japanese).. and it seems to clearly translate in both languages “To Live – is to breathe wondrously and ephermerously. To advocate and to attachs the Lens of Realism to the Skeptic that Denies, the Totalitarian that hates, the Oligarchs that breeds plays for monopoly money, and the Cherished if Whom is Divine; so she may sit at the seat of The One That Suffers. : For she is dead and remains true and he is alive, but remains false. Captivated by Kismet Indifference and brought together in Union peareance {perseveres} “Synchronicity.” For that Love remains Unbound through The Looking Glass, that no other may see but We, and Then-some. For this, we Prevail and for this; we are spoken.”
This is the prayer that takes 2:32mins /secs at the beginning of every Buddhist temple. Regardless of nation, nor sect. There are no factions of Buddhism, only conhinderance and respect towards their living places and cultures.
Almost everything I’ve learned about Buddhism as my days jumping between “Clergy Assistance, Monastery Maintenance Assistance, the Sweeper of the Shinto Temple of San Diego County, and Flea Market “stall director” of any dirty desert cross frame I ended up in not to mention being a guided practitioner of Assisted Hebrew Scroll Transcription for the Blind, Hard-of-Hearing, and Deaf and “Sanitary Swampswoman” at the Mosque of Indexcima. .. everything I’ve learned online from facets of the sort of “lucky girl syndrome” trend I came across. Crystals, incense , tarot, meditations, chakras, readings… It’s unfortunate as it gives us and those that are trained within the SSR to achieve these masterful levels as apprenti, novice, youthful director, to Zenshin, to Master, to Ruthful One all the way to many of those that surpass Nirvana and Live~Enlightened.. can’t help but feeling it was a pay-to-play move on Eastern Dialects. Whatever the hell a yogi and reiki license is… I never heard of that before all those years spent at the Temple or otherwise.
Everything I learned was deemed “cross-cultural” or “non-translatable” as a person that proclaims “Soy-Mixto” in the face of “Who are you? What are you? Okay, you don’t look like them.. where are you reeaaalllyy from???” Eye rolls and everything. Based on my appearance, you can only imagine my warm regards of a Red Hat House Matriarch having to explain.. I don’t adhere to any religion and I struggle with Agnostic Atheism but am Full-Time Spiritually Captivated.
As much as I’ve read of your works… You’re damn well studied and studied as I have in those places and dialects.
I think looking elsewhere and feeling insolence is consuming of the soul.
“Nourish what is within, and then you will see with Clarity” “dogmasheshsinaei”
Hope this wasn’t too much of a comment, just seems to be one of those days here in the WP Community.
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No worries! I believe with the right perspective, our challenges can be leveraged into signs, guidelines, and advantages. Sounds like that’s what you’re doing! And yes, continually looking at others with insolence is a perpetuation of duality and a relinquishment of one’s own nondual power. However, if the insolence is natural and organic and not brought about through conscious deliberation, then it can be accepted and felt with mindfulness like any external phenomena, and then leveraged into a positive occurrence. As with all things, paradox applies and navigation is a function of alignment between the surface consciousness, the deeper self, and the nondual core.
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I think these are very well-put and well condensed points here. I think about every dialect has a slang term or phrase. Like Brooklyn “do what ya want when you’re popping!!” Is really “what lesson are you gonna learn out of your struggles?” I think learning on the more formal side is how the bow gets wrapped to kinda solidify these points. I enjoy them from every aspect. Nice stuff, Kent!!
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For a few hundred thousand years, homosapiens’ productivity was rooted directly in survival (a few million years of one counts archaic hominids). We hunted for meat, foraged for edible plants and fungi, crafted animal fur clothing to not freeze to death, and beat stones into more useful stones to perform these tasks more efficiently. Our brain’s reward system is wired for this.
Modern life is far more abstract. Our skills are hyper specialized and our reward is most often money. While money can be used to buy food, clothing, and tools, it can also be traded for powerful intoxicants and shiny but useless junk, making the reward less direct and potentially harmful to our well-being.
Finding contentment and positivity in being productive in the pursuit of money can be difficult. “Money is the root of all evil” is a common cliche for a reason, and if one focuses on this, it can condemn everything they work for to darkness and negativity. Basically, we aren’t wired for this crap.
Returning to the basics, simplifying one’s life to whatever degree modern life allows can weed out the artificial hijackings of our reward system and perhaps not solve discontentment but at least make clear to the individual what is truly important and what is bringing them down.
If everything pisses you off and hatred and destruction consume you, you might just need to eat.
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Well put!
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I like what you said. I too thought by putting out others shortcomings, somehow made me feel superior, but in reality it made me pessimistic. My new attitude is to throw out the positive in people which makes me feel better inside.
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Great outlook! Yes, for a while I tried to be negative in service of positive, but I realized I was beating my head against a wall. If people want to be negative, that’s their choice, which is actually empowering, because the same is true if I want to be positive.
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a pep talk and a cosmic breath are pretty much necessary before a performance
they set the stage—mind and body—for success
it’s after the curtain’s drawn that adopting a positive mindset is most important
that’s when you notice each mistake to address
it’s tempting to let yourself nag and berate,
to wallow, and even despond…
the experts all recommend to celebrate,
to learn from it, then move beyond
in the words of Miss Cassandra Worthy:
you can get bitter, or you can get better
you control how you respond
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Bitter or better–I like it!
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Positive pep talks work.
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Experience is gathered from earlier mistakes, but life’s journey encourages another positive step forward.
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