When things have gone awry, I used to inwardly match the urgency of the moment. Over time, I learned that even though I might need to be outwardly frantic, I prefer to internally compose myself as fast as possible. Personally, I get there through acceptance, which may appear as resignation. ”It is what it is,” “that happened,” and other noninflammatory mental stances. Ironically, these stances allow me to exert a stronger influence; instead of being driven by reactive fear and/or anger, they settle my perception and increase the possibility I will glimpse hidden opportunities or unexpected advantages.
Dirty Sci-Fi Buddha 
Acceptance is never resignation if you are actively (and rationally) working to rectify the situation. I guess for me, resignation has a negative connotation. Might not for everyone.
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Taking ownership of our feelings and gaining a little perspective makes sense.
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This is so valid in my experience – for the inner journeys. But if someone or “thing” as the case may be is holding one of your loved ones hostage, outwardly matching or surpassing the urgency of the moment is necessitated.
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Absolutely!
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I can see by your PTSD that you know more about this than I do.
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You might have more, you never know! I’ve heard people in bad car accidents tend to have the worst cases. I just try and do what works for me and have fun with life. 🙂
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oic. Which one was the worst do you suppose.. the red and white Chrysler with the push button gear shift or the blue Thunderbird – or was there another?
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Well if we’re talking about getting hit, I’ll take a coup or a mini over an SUV 😅
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oh, well maybe we’re talking about heavy (because they’re old) sewing machines. Mine’s a Brother. It’s heavy but I can carry it with ease. It’s worth its weight in gold – or bismuth.
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Just looked up bismuth. It looks way nicer than gold!
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“It is what it is” — a phrase that exasperates people when I use it. But it often applies most when things seem most dire.
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I agree. It helps prevent tunnel vision.
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Accepting that things can’t change, and then seeing what you can best do to work with them, is one of the best attitudes I’ve learned to adopt.
I exchange in a lot of debates at the community I manage, mostly healthy ones though where everyone just wants a conversation. We’ve come to realize majority of those who can’t “agree to disagree” end up failing their arguements since they’re forcing another person to change to their ways rather than listening to what another person might need.
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Interesting! Makes sense, though–if you can’t acknowledge that someone has a different perspective, you can’t understand how to assess the differences and find a weakness in their argument.
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I used to be that way when I was younger, but since I’ve become older, I get more easily frustrated and I seem to go into a panic like catatonic state.
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I hope things get better for you!
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This is a long lesson to learn.
Gwen.
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Sometimes it requires a lot of negative experiences that become cautionary tales to draw on.
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So perceptive.
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I sometimes say the same thing to myself.
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And then there are the opposites, like myself, that do not match the energy of the moment. I tend to do the needful and then only after the urgency is over do I fall apart and question what was done. Then the mental demons hold on and take forever to resolve.
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It’s a wonderful way to embrace acceptance. To turn an “it is what it is” around and see it as an opportunity. We all have those times, acknowledging the honest emotions is essential to finding a path forward. Thanks for sharing.
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I agree, it’s part of the art of life in my opinion!
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Great piece. I couldn’t agree more. Acceptance is the key! Thanks for all the support you have given me on my blog 🙂
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Accepting reality is always the best way to go.
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Acceptance is one of the strongest forces we can apply to our lives. Our emotion centers of the brain (amygdala) can easily override higher decision making areas. Accepting allows processing of emotions and has the ability to literally change your brain.
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Interesting! I never heard of it from a neurophysiological point of view. Over the last two decades, emotional management seems to be stepping out of woo-woo territory into more applicable, performance-oriented conversations.
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We need to get out of our own way…. !!! Fear, doubt, etc etc..hinder self growth!!! https://ruparaoruminates.wordpress.com/
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I appreciate your positive take on the inevitable roadblocks that will arise in front of us. We need to let go and keep moving toward the next open gate.
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Indeed! The river flows on, regardless of any effort to stop it. We can, however, read the currents and steer towards better places.
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