Others’ standards are a way to explore potential and appreciate life. They’re not an excuse to condemn myself as a failure, and wallow in a morass of unproductive self-flagellation.
I believe others who judge you–while they may applaud or denounce you for following or rejecting their checklist–can never give you lasting fulfillment. Only you can do that.
Dirty Sci-Fi Buddha 
That’s why they’re called “standards” and not “requirements”. They’re something to aspire to, but they’re not necessary to make for a good life or career.
Or like Barbarossa said in the first Pirates of the Caribbean movie: “They’re more of what you call ‘guidelines’ than actual rules.” Of course, he was talking about the Pirate Code there, but I think it could apply to other things in life as well.
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Great quote, and I agree! The Pirate Code is full of wisdom!
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Standards and rules are guidelines. Many quite good, designed to maximize immersion into a craft. Understanding is one thing, clinging is another. Picasso said something about learning the rules like a pro so you can break them like an artist. However, nowhere in that is it advised to take a cafeteria style approach to the rules. Wax on, wax off, if you get my meaning.
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Well said, Kent.
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Thank you!
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You’re welcome.
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“Now that you’re not perfect, you can be good.” – John Steinbeck, East of Eden.
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I suppose I judge people too much. I am working on it. Nice post.
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I agree. The best-feeling approval is one’s own.
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A friend of mine says it like this: “It’s none of your business what other people think of you”….
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It has been four years. I never realized how much I’d missed your musings!
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Welcome back! I say the same things mostly in different words, but I’m glad you enjoy reading them!
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[…] you say, “No, this can’t happen to me”Did you rush to the phone to callWas there a voice unkind in the back of your mindSaying maybe you didn’t know him at allYou didn’t know him at […]
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Thanks for the share!
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Others can motivate you, inspire you, try to hold you back, or be apathetic. But what matters is you.
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Hi Kent, have seen you on my blog recently – thanks for the likes btw – so I thought I check yours out and I certainly like this one. The risk for wallowing in self-dislike for me needs almost no input from others. it’s good to have a practice, inner guidelines to minimise episodes and curtail them if/when they occur. 🙂
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Absolutely! In my opinion, it’s an integral part of emotional intelligence
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good point!
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