Some evil wizard has apparently figured out how to fuse vegan-evangelists and grammar nazis and—no surprise—the result of this evil wizardry is a dog-sized tarantula with the head of a bespectacled nerd.  They’re coming at me en masse, hissing and spitting a stream of self-righteous venom.  I have nowhere to run, so I jump on a tree—HUP!—and begin shimmying up.  I’m clinging precariously to the uppermost part of the tree, swaying in the breeze, when I open my eReader to Echo.  Magic flash.  A squat rack appears in the air.  A parachute bursts from its crosspiece and slows its fall.  I lean back, then forward—extending the treetop toward the rack—and leap.  I hop on the rack and follow it to the ground.  I immediately start repping out squats, and dazzling Batman symbols crackle through the air, spinning and whirling around me.  The vortex of energy builds to a peak, and on the peak of my next rep, I open my mouth and gaze at the sky.  Fifth Element style energy explodes from me and washes outward, disintegrating the tarantulas in a blaze of radiance.  Nothing can stand up to a Batsymbol-laden squat rack.  Absolutely nothing.

When you’re being chased by spider-nerds, there is only one solution:  5 x 5s on Batman’s magical squat rack.  Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here:  Vol. 1 on Kindle.  Vol. 2 on Kindle here:  Vol.2 on Kindle