I believe that the deeper I know the “why” behind my actions, the better I am at persevering through discomforts.  Not only that, but I also become better at enjoying transient pleasures without getting too attached to them.

To me, fully knowing the “why” is dependent on examining the evidence arising from my past actions, then exploring their implications with a critical eye, no matter how unpleasant or ennobling any of them may seem.

Like everyone else, I’ll experience happiness and depression, motivation and lethargy.  To me, the question is not so much whether I cling to one end of the spectrum and avoid the other, but whether I continue working towards my objectives, and continue acting in a way that brings me peace at a bone-deep level.

From what I’ve seen, the peaks of happiness and motivation will fade away, and so will the troughs of depression and lethargy.  Those are fickle points to navigate by; I would rather know myself deeply enough to be guided through a clarity of intent, and in so doing, feel a harmony that transcends pain and pleasure, that exists beyond motivation and lethargy.

The passage of time and the steady diminishment of my capabilities means that even if I do nothing, my objectives gradually creep away from me.

To me, this means that each second is a vote.  I can use that second to gain territory (or at least learn something in the attempt), or I can use it to enjoy what I have.  Quite often, I find that I can do both at the same time.

The other option—stewing in a mess of low-level anxiety because I’ve been procrastinating—does not appeal to me.

I’ve seen people chase their bliss by getting the right this or that, by doing XYZ tasks at ABC times.

Call me lazy, but I have found that the opposite approach is much more accessible and far less stressful (although in the short term, it’s incredibly uncomfortable):  I try and dig into my faults/shortcomings, reconfigure them, and arrange the components of my own perception so that I can make use of what’s right in front of me.  That has seemed far more conducive to “flow” than trying to constantly grapple with the environment.

Basically, I prefer to wrench my perception into harmony with the environment rather than try and force the environment into line with my perception.

As I delved deeper and deeper into the idea of an all-powerful, all-knowing benevolence that doesn’t just guide us but also comprises us, a funny thing happened to me:  I became agnostic (I don’t believe one way or another in the existence of a higher power).

Because I realized if such a force exists and its benevolence is indeed without limits, it will love me whether I believe in it or not.  I don’t need to waste my energy arguing its case, or trying to prove its existence (it is, after all, all-powerful and all-knowing, so why should I waste time bleating about it or worshipping it?  If it exists, it’s already incomparably powerful and inalienably evident.  It doesn’t need me to defend or evangelize it.)

I simply need to do the best I can with what’s in front of me, and be as kind as possible to those around me.  All that higher pay-grade stuff has been taken care of.

And if it doesn’t exist, well hell—doing the best I can with what’s in front of me and being kind to those around me covers all the concerns that I want to address.

In the past, I have been hamstrung by preferences.  I have either favored the all-out surge, or the slow, steady advance.  But life does not necessarily accommodate one approach all the time.  That’s why I believe it’s important to use all tools—logic, intuition, and constant, CONSTANT assessment of evidence and context—to justify whatever approach I pick with sound thinking and vigilant perception.

Being humble and honest about which pieces of me function in a mechanistic manner allows me to strategize their placement/employment…it allows me to direct these processes, and in doing so, honor the premise that maybe, just MAYBE, I am in possession of something as precious—and arguably divine—as free will.

So yeah—humility, honesty, and constant assessment of the evidence.  The more I focus on these, the more I increase my chances that I won’t end up as a predictable, flesh-bound robot.

It’s crucial to keep trying.  The misses may be discouraging, but they’re incredibly important; if I can figure out how much I missed by, and for what reason, I can use all that to inform my strategy, and allow me a greater chance of hitting future targets.

I like to quality-check my actions by assessing if they’re ethical and functional within a given context.  The rest of it—religion, mysticism, supernatural, etc. etc.—can be added on later. 

I’ve seen too many people led astray by their idea of how things “truly are,” to not assess each situation as a separate set of circumstances.