Just an FYI: A Door into Evermoor is up on Nook and all avenues available through Smashwords premium catalog! (Kobo, Overdrive, Scribd, and a bunch of others).
I’ll leave it up until the end of the month, then take it down so I can put it up on Kindle Unlimited.
Just make sure it is for real down or apparently Kindle can get pretty cranky about unfortunate timing issues. At least that is what I heard.
I’ll tell you why I say this. I unpublished with one place that did multi places. After closing my account and waiting a month, I still was finding it up. So, not just blowing smoke…I literally could have gone Kindle Select, but after looking got nervous. I would suggest putting up clean e-books (never published) to go Select. I literally had a horrible time to get the old copies down. It was horrible and I decided to go with Amazon and Smashwords as I couldn’t trust it was totally down. Not just saying it to cause issues. Saying it because I had issues. If I decided to go Amazon Kindle Select, I’d do it before doing other stuff and take it off Kindle. Hope this makes sense and helps.
I mean take it off Kindle Select and go just Kindle rather than the other way around.
Sorry—due to the low sales on those, I only publish on them if someone specifically requests it, then I leave it up for a month and take it down so I can go Kindle Unlimited. Just let me know if you’re interested in another platform when I release a new book, and I’ll happily accommodate! 🙂
Yep, I understand—I was in the military. As a small cog in a big machine, my problems didn’t matter as long as the gears kept turning. I definitely appreciate the support, but I’m having fun regardless, so my main hope is that I pass some of that onto you through a good read. At the same time, no worries if you don’t finish or move on to another book. I’m flattered that you gave my stuff a try in the first place! 😊
Interesting you bring that up! You probably already noticed, but I wanted to make Evermoor (and the whole story) racially inclusive, but I didn’t want it to be a main plot point; I just wanted it to have a solid rationale and an organic part of the story. If younger people read this, I want there to be an unquestioned sense of inclusiveness. (Growing up Asian in Wisconsin and in the nineties, it kind of sucked to think I was unattractive just because of race; I didn’t realize I looked good until my early thirties. I actually wanted Jon to be full Asian, but it was hard to reconcile that with his last name—Dough—which has a lot of symbolic weight with the whole unidentified dead body thing, so I decided to write that his mother’s genes were stronger to the point where he could easily pass as full Asian) The Elves were kind of an accident, though—I didn’t intend to make them a counterpoint against Dark Elves/Drow. I didn’t realize there was a racial component to them until I read an article a couple days ago (months after I wrote that scene) talking about Drizzt and how even though he was black, he was the only good one out of an entire race. Kind of shocking what you accept as a kid—I read tons of Drizzt and he was probably my favorite character, but even though I was acutely aware of racial misrepresentation in the media, I never once questioned if his storylines were racist. It’s weird when something completely obvious is brought to your attention, but you haven’t questioned it your whole life.
No worries—gotta get those thoughts out!
Don’t feel sorry for any of my past stuff—all of it turned out great for me! Took a little while for the women to come around, but that was more my mentality than any real racism, in most cases. Nowadays, the only racism I experience is hilarious and welcome. By that I mean that every so often, I’ll sleep with a lady and she’ll give my girthy, upcurved nether parts a disbelieving stare and say something along the lines of, “You are NOT Asian.” And I. LOVE IT. 🤣 Still—there’s a reason I live in CA and not in the south or midwest.
That part about your son, though…as much bullying as I experienced as a kid, it always weirds me out when people are racist to others’ faces. Up close and personal is something way different, and at that age, it’s especially impactful.
I agree—everyone has something that messes with them, and while I’m not a judgy, pull-yourself-up-by-the-bootstrap type, I do think that at some point it is up to me to focus on the stuff I like rather than the stuff I don’t. But it’s fine if others aren’t with me on that—I like to give benefit of the doubt and help anyone that asks, but I found it’s impossible to help someone who truly doesn’t want to be helped, no matter how much pain they’re in. Everything is just a temporary, unsatisfying fix until they truly decide they want to move into a different space. That’s my experience with myself and my friends, at least.
I don’t know about the bustier, thicker ladies being out of vogue—seems like they’re coming into vogue, if anything. But definitely still a lot of hate out there.
“Karens in the wild” 🤣 Priceless!
I too, have been maddened by the infuriating Karen superpower that keeps me up in bed, seething with anger, but I can’t imagine how pissed I would be if they were Karen-ing at one of my children. Punching bag seems like a must-have!
I feel for you—it can definitely take a toll on self-worth if people disapprove of or turn their noses up at your appearance. I’m glad you were able to get some reconciliation.
Honestly, dance class sounds better than the punching bag! During one of my injuries, I started learning hip-hop dancing off YouTube, but I had to start from scratch—I had no idea what a snare was, or what it meant to groove, so every one of my moves was stiff and flavorless. Some day I’ll get back to it; I would love to dance like Techno Viking or BTS, LOL!
Nice! Yeah, imo dancing is the exercise that’s most geared toward fun.
I tried going to a class before, but it was basically just monkey see, monkey do. The instructor would do it slow, we’d follow, then it’d be to a count, then to music. Then it’d be another mini-sequence, and then we’d eventually start chaining the mini-sequences together into a full sequence.
But I didn’t know you had to bounce or hit with each snare—they really should teach that in beginner’s class, dammit! I felt like I was doing some kind of cult movement until I learned those concepts on youtube, lol!
Before I answer, thank you Thank You THANK YOU for the review! LOLed at “these girls don’t go anywhere without a holster.” 🤣
This is a somewhat convoluted one. But long story short, I think the base of my philosophy comes from two things: the fact that I worked much, MUCH harder than people more talented than me who surpassed me anyways, and my desire for life to have an overall fairness to it.
After years in the military (and a meditation cult which had me meditating an hour or two a day to increase my “power” so good stuff could happen to me), I tried drugs for the first time (early thirties) with the sole purpose of smoking DMT, which my vet buddy said I could get from a safe source. (smoked DMT, if you don’t know, is reputable for being short, never giving a bad trip, and having the strongest ego-dissolution/God-merging “breakthrough” experience out of all drugs). That allowed me to finish Echo, which—no spoilers—but basically ends with the summation that we are all love, laughter and dreams.
After I got out out of college, I continued the ruthless emphasis on logic and discipline; I busted my ass trying to be a worker/writer, (I would wake up at 2:45am, work out, write, work, sleep, repeat). Obviously, this began to wear on me.
My vet buddy during this time sends me some law of attraction stuff, which I scoffed at, but gave a listen to because it was my buddy. As time passed, I realized the one thing I had never tried was a consistent focus on positivity.
I shifted from my vet buddy’s LOA (law of attraction) recommendation over to Esther Hicks, who, though she claims to channel spirits, has pretty much all her material up for free on youtube (which she jokes about) and also comments on how redundant she is (she jokes you can learn everything by listening to one or two videos, you don’t need to pay a few hundred to go on one of her cruises and see her in person).
Most importantly, she frames LOA so that it doesn’t imply victim-blaming (in my opinion) and in a way that doesn’t constantly require you to focus on the positive, but on lack of resistance to the entirety of your being. Her contention is that we came as pieces of a creative omnipotence so that we could enjoy the narrative of limitation (this is reflected in other philosophies—the only parameter omnipotence lacks is limitation, so it can’t create a story because a story requires time and space but a god-analogue is everywhere and past present and future all at once) and create unexpected plots within our own stories (thanks to the parameters given by limitation).
Unpleasant experiences are labeled “contrast” in her paradigm (contrast between the entirety of self and the limited self) which serves as clarification for what kind of narrative we wish to manifest. We can manifest unpleasant narratives by continuing to focus on contrast, but once we die, we get sucked back into Source (her name for God, which comes with too many sticky connotations for her preference) and sink back into bliss/omnipotence/whatever you want to call it. There’s a few more intricacies to this (basically, our emotions are indicators as to what kind of manifestations we are summoning, but the buffer of time gives us plenty of time to clarify what we want). I eventually made my decision to adopt this philosophy because of personal anecdotes: despite being overall negative and way too uptight, good things seemed to happen when I just relaxed and stopped caring. (I have experienced some good fortune 20 years earlier than I had initially planned, turning work into a choice and not a requirement) I didn’t even have to be positive—I could just be chill. (Which is in line with her “lack of resistance”). Once again anecdotal, but as I continued to focus on being positive—or being apathetic, if that felt forced—better and better stuff happened to me. One thing I love about her philosophy is that she says you don’t need to know anything about it for it to work; if you pay attention to your “inner guidance” (basically being emotionally aware) then things will turn out well. She also says in the greater context, you can never get it wrong and you can never get it done (meaning contrast just provides greater desire and clarification, which is held in escrow until you relax resistance, and it also means creation is ever-expanding into new desires and iterations). I get great peace from that as well; there is no static “perfection,” I simply enjoy the moment, or—if i’m feeling resistance—reach for whatever thought gives me the feeling of relief (reach for anger when I’m afraid, reach for revenge/boredom/hate/frustration/apathy when I’m angry, etc.)
I also began to question why I exist. Did I (or anyone else) come here to pay the price or fill out some abstract checklist before I could finally enjoy myself (which might not even be scheduled for this life in judeo-christian religions) or did I come here to revel in weirdness and adventure and create my experience in unexpected and spontaneous ways during my brief time here?
Long story short, my anecdotal experiences have guided me to this thought process, along with my desire for everyone to have an equal ability to create their own narrative in a no-lose game. (Otherwise it is so damn depressing!) Hope that wasn’t too wordy! 🙂
Also, as far as “the spell of At Least:” I understand that for many people, it can help them stay positive, and I think that’s great. It’s just that in Jon’s mind, it doesn’t have a positive connotation at all, especially when he’s caught in the Trance.
Personally, I don’t have anything against someone using gratitude (although for me I would rather appreciate things, as gratitude is more conditional; you are grateful FOR something, where I can just appreciate the blue sky or my hot coffee, it’s the difference between justification and visceral focus). Whatever makes you feel positive and empowered is awesome, as far as I’m concerned. It’s just with Jon, it comes with negativity and the eventual feeling of being trapped and powerless. Hope that explains it better. 🙂
I have held very much the same views as you at a different point in life, and I greatly respect them, especially since they come from personal experience. That to me indicates you aren’t trying to be anyone other than yourself, which is where progress happens. I recently heard that we view our experiences autobiographically, and I think that’s accurate.
My take on where are differences meet is that we have to do what resonates with us. If your belief and faith lies in hard work, I think it’s admirable and genuine to work hard and be proud of it. I also think that you are right to engage in actions and beliefs that allow you to hold your head up high and see yourself as a good person.
I don’t mean to condemn or judge with Jon’s point of view or the implied difference between our beliefs (you probably already knew that, but just want to make it clear on such a weighty subject). My entire focus for awhile was cobbling together a portfolio of rental properties so I could support my mom in retirement, because there was no way in hell my flighty brother was going to do it. She too, sacrificed greatly to raise me in the US when my dad left early. Her own family turned against her when she needed them most, which, somehow, she let go of and made amends with them. I was willing to grind myself into the dust to make sure I was able to help her.
Thanks for not taking offense with my point of view! I know with this kind of thing, judgment can fly fast and furious, so I was a little surprised when you asked for an insight into my perspective, then I mentally kicked myself when I reread your request and it was specifically an insight into my perspective regarding Jon’s view of the at least thing. Once again, I believe in merging with any train of thought that gives you relief and hopefully moves you toward joy.
Jon’s thought process in the trance parallels a victim of abuse in that he rationalizes himself into staying in a situation that isn’t good for him. I have real-life friends who are a bit closer (though not as dramatic) in example to Jon. They continually tell me what they’d like to do (unlike you or past me, they have no obligations that would hold them back from acting on their dreams) but things don’t change, and then they feel bad about it. It used to frustrate me at first, but then I realized my personal quest to help them only works when the folks I was trying to help wanted to be helped. My door is always open, I always try and give the benefit of the doubt (already have some plans for charity on the off-chance I make lots of money, because given my simple lifestyle, I would fast reach a point where I would just be hoarding it and engaging in scarcity mentality despite being wealthy), but for a while I was weirded out because I actually pissed friends off by continually trying to assist them. Come to find out, they would prefer the comfort of the familiar over the fulfillment of expansion (which, to be clear, is not at all the case with you from what I’ve read). I made my peace with their choice by realizing it’s not a bad thing! Sometimes, people have to talk about something for a while before they do it. Sometimes, they just like talking about it, which is fine as well. I’ve dithered and held myself back at certain points in my life, so my judgment in those situations was hypocritical, I later realized.
Anyways, even though it’s totally fine that they use “at least” to stay where they are and tread water, that doesn’t sound like that’s the case with you. I know what obligation feels like from family and military, and in your case, it’s even heavier, as none of my experiences compare with the level of care and duty when it comes to a parent raising a child; you have all the power, and they’re still trying to find theirs.
Jon is in a completely different situation, and he’s facing the choice of using “at least” to keep himself from moving toward fulfillment. Even though it’s fine from an outsider’s perspective, he is realizing that it’s not at all what he wants, so it really hurts him.
I’m being redundant, but I feel my next point really needs to be hammered in: just because Jon and I have run afoul of bad examples of “at least” doesn’t mean you are doing the same. It sounds like it’s doing you good, and that’s what matters!
Absolutely! And even though it’s good for the plot, I get it that at the heart of Jon (and to be honest, my older self’s) view on suburbia and the corporate world, there’s a lot of naivete and implied judgment, whether he means it or not. For awhile, I was stuck in similar positions to what he dreads, and obviously it’s not as clear cut as just follow your dreams and run off into a fantasy land.
The irony is that the responsibility he’s facing now is a billion times heavier; he went from the prospect of a first world slog to being the savior of all Evermoor. At least he got the girl, lol!
It definitely gets bumpy for Jon (even though he’s the hero, I felt his background allowed me to write him as the traditionally jealous damsel in distress in many instances, whereas his gf gets to be the action hero badass—sometimes I think of him as the helpless love interest in Temple of Doom, while his gf is Indy) but a lot of it in his head, at least until the end. I have a pretty good idea of how to finish the series, and no spoilers, but I believe in a painful middle and a happy ending, like you said. I generally dislike stories where where the hero gets screwed and their only takeaway is a bittersweet lesson.
Oh, I was also married for ten years as well. By the end, me and the wife were basically roommates. I think my preferences for a relationship now are an independent lady who would have enough hobbies where she wouldn’t feel threatened by mine, probably separate beds (maybe even separate houses right next to each other) and DEFINITELY separate bathrooms, LOL!
Thank you! Doubt it though—being a Man Whore is far too enjoyable! 🤣
Since I’m ultimately writing through my own guy-shaped lens, I most likely will always see more nuance on the male side of things (I don’t want to overreach and make things fake or pandering—I doubt I could pull off a novel through first person female), but I like to try and be as inclusive as possible while preserving the flow and excitement of the story. Originally, when the book was just a vague concept in my head, I had been envisioning scenes with just Jon and Ren, so for a long time I assumed it was going to be a buddy-cop fantasy with all the contrast and humor arising from Ren’s sour-faced badassedness versus Jon’s charming ineptitude. Then I decided to make Gyrax more consistent, and I also wanted a love interest for Jon who could hold her own against the rest of the party, so she’d obviously be able to kick his ass…etcetera etcetera. It made for a great opportunity to turn the damsel in distress stuff on its head. (Can’t remember, but I think in the super early concept stages, Ren and Jon were supposed to go back to earth, not Erany).
Also, it gave me an excuse to throw in a dramatic kiss. I’m a giant fan of kissing (to the point where I really wouldn’t be interested in sex without it), so in all my stories thus far I’ve included a Big Moment Kiss where everything’s going haywire and the kiss signals some kind of resolution or positive turn of events. Even Echo has one in book 3, LOL!
Kent Wayne 
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