Tag: humor
-
Echo: A Dystopian Science Fiction Novel
I’m eeeevil….SOOOO EEEEEVVVILL… “Sith Lord Kent! The rebels have arrived! In less than an hour, we shall crush those traitors beneath our heels!” Fuck, man—I don’t wanna crush no rebels. I signed up to be a Sith Lord for the cool black robes. Now all I do is work, work, work. Why couldn’t I have…
-
Please buy and review Kor’Thank and Echo!
What the finger-sniff is happening, all you hypocrites who claim that it’s gross but secretly LOVE to get your phalanges all greased up and smelly with your own brand of goo before taking a giant whiff right off their tips and rolling your eyes back in absolute ecsta— What. The fuck. Are you DOING??? Keep…
-
Kor’Thank: A High School Absurdical
Flying high—that’s what I do, all day, err’ day! ’Cause I’m a mothafuckin’ dragon, bitch! I turn to my buddy, Cynosure the Red, and raise one of my reptilian eyebrows. “What do you wanna do today, Cyno? Fuck with the Kraken? Shit on some villages? Piss off the unicorns?” His scaly forehead wrinkles in thought. …
-
Please buy and review Kor’Thank and Echo!
What the Obliviot (oblivious idiot: a dipshit who steals oxygen by constantly spewing word-vomit that could easily be debunked or resolved with a quick internet search or a couple seconds of critical thinking) is happening, all my fellow Exasperateds who’ve stared with burning anger and clenched jaws at the dork in the meeting who tries…
-
Echo: A Dystopian Science Fiction Novel
The blank page beckons. And I heed its call. Or DO I? FORTY-EIGHT HOURS LATER, AFTER SEVENTEEN EJACULATIONS, THREE STUFFED CRUST PIZZAS, AND A MARATHON SESSION OF STANNING TAYLOR SWIFT’S INSTAGRAM… Urgghh…think I’ve ruined my balls. Not a single sperm left within their wrinkled folds…God, Taylor…why do you insist on giving me boners… I belly-crawl…
-
Please buy and review Kor’Thank and Echo!
What the pity sex is happening, my fellow Desperates who’ve gotten down on your knees and hugged the ankle of your desired lay while bawling AHPLEASEGODFUCKME at the top of your lungs, ugly-crying like Will Ferrell in an all-out attempt to— Jesus Christ, man—you don’t want pity sex! You want a hole-widening good time with…
-
Kor’Thank: A High School Absurdical
God DAMMIT. It isn’t easy being Kent Wayne’s big toe. “Neglect” is too poor a word for it—he lets all manner of cheese and fungus grow on my surface, then treats it like a scratch-n-sniff when he doesn’t think anyone’s looking. Disgusting. To add insult to insult, his other body parts get blatant favoritism. His…
-
Please buy and review Kor’Thank and Echo!
What the thick-dick is happening, all my fellow well-endowed thickies who’ve measured your penis obsessively as a kid (from the TOP and not the asshole, unlike some of you fucking cheaters!) and sighed in disappointment each morning when it failed to extend to the desired 20 inches but then jumped for joy when you realized…
-
Echo: A Dystopian Science Fiction Novel
Sigh. Man, it’s tough being young. Like many college freshman, I’m broke, timid, and horny. SIGH. As I sit through class after class, jotting down notes about a bunch of long-winded dead dudes, I can’t help but wonder why everyone else seems so damn interested in anything besides cumming. Please deliver me from Keynesian Economics…
-
Please buy and review Kor’Thank and Echo!
What the coffee-poop is happening, my fellow java enthusiasts who have enjoyed a nice cuppa joe, then suddenly gone pale as your asshole clenches like an anaconda’s death-grip, forcing you to whisper “Dear God no” before sprinting out of the room, plunking d0own on the toilet, and screaming to the point where a network of…
Kent Wayne 