Musings

Others’ standards are a way to explore potential and appreciate life. They’re not an excuse to condemn myself as a failure, and wallow in a morass of unproductive self-flagellation.

I believe others who judge you–while they may applaud or denounce you for following or rejecting their checklist–can never give you lasting fulfillment. Only you can do that.


Comments

18 responses to “Musings”

  1. Thatโ€™s why theyโ€™re called โ€œstandardsโ€ and not โ€œrequirementsโ€. Theyโ€™re something to aspire to, but theyโ€™re not necessary to make for a good life or career.

    Or like Barbarossa said in the first Pirates of the Caribbean movie: โ€œTheyโ€™re more of what you call โ€˜guidelinesโ€™ than actual rules.โ€ Of course, he was talking about the Pirate Code there, but I think it could apply to other things in life as well.

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    1. Great quote, and I agree! The Pirate Code is full of wisdom!

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  2. Standards and rules are guidelines. Many quite good, designed to maximize immersion into a craft. Understanding is one thing, clinging is another. Picasso said something about learning the rules like a pro so you can break them like an artist. However, nowhere in that is it advised to take a cafeteria style approach to the rules. Wax on, wax off, if you get my meaning.

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  3. Well said, Kent.

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      1. You’re welcome.

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  4. “Now that you’re not perfect, you can be good.” – John Steinbeck, East of Eden.

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  5. I suppose I judge people too much. I am working on it. Nice post.

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  6. I agree. The best-feeling approval is one’s own.

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  7. A friend of mine says it like this: “It’s none of your business what other people think of you”….

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  8. It has been four years. I never realized how much I’d missed your musings!

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    1. Welcome back! I say the same things mostly in different words, but I’m glad you enjoy reading them!

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  9. […] you say, “No, this can’t happen to me”Did you rush to the phone to callWas there a voice unkind in the back of your mindSaying maybe you didn’t know him at allYou didn’t know him at […]

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    1. Thanks for the share!

      Like

  10. nowandforeverwriter Avatar
    nowandforeverwriter

    Others can motivate you, inspire you, try to hold you back, or be apathetic. But what matters is you.

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  11. Hi Kent, have seen you on my blog recently – thanks for the likes btw – so I thought I check yours out and I certainly like this one. The risk for wallowing in self-dislike for me needs almost no input from others. it’s good to have a practice, inner guidelines to minimise episodes and curtail them if/when they occur. ๐Ÿ™‚

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    1. Absolutely! In my opinion, it’s an integral part of emotional intelligence

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      1. good point!

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