Tag: writing

Check out my high school absurdical, Kor’Thank: Barbarian Valley Girl! (Yes, I know “absurdical” is a made up word)

DirtySciFiBuddha1 Comment

Idiot demon-jocks, tons of profanity, copious psychedelics, and an airborne kiss at 300 mph, hanging from the back of a mushroom-shaped mecha!  All this and more in my comedy/horror/sci-fi absurdical, Kor’Thank: Barbarian Valley Girl! #Kindle #KindleUnlimited #writingcommunity #writer #booktok #writerscommunity #writing

Check it out here: Kor’Thank: Barbarian Valley Girl

Get A Door into Evermoor here: A Door into Evermoor.  Paperback here: A Door into Evermoor, paperback.    Get Weapons of Old here:  Weapons of Old  Get Kor’Thank here:  Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl.  Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here:  Vol. 1 on Kindle.  Vol. 2 on Kindle here:  Vol.2 on Kindle  Vol. 3 on Kindle here:  Vol. 3 on Kindle  Vol.4 on Kindle here:  Vol. 4 on Kindle  Echo Omnibus here:  Echo Omnibus  Echo Vol. 1 & 2 Combined Edition here:  Combined Edition  Musings, Volume 1 is available here:  Musings, Volume 1  Here’s the miscellaneous gear that I use to try and become an uber-human:  Optimization!  🙂 🙂 😀

Hold on!  I just got approved to be an Amazon affiliate!  If you’re going to buy ANY product from Amazon, and you’d like to support my efforts for absolutely free, then simply click on one of the Echo links I’ve provided—they’ll send you to Echo’s Amazon page—and THEN buy whatever product you wish.  Amazon gives me a small referral fee each time this happens!  In this manner you can support my books, musings, zany ads, or my adventures along the noble path known as The Way of The Man Child WITHOUT spending any more money than you were already going to!  Should you do this, I vow to send you a silent blessing, causing your genitals to adopt the optimum size, shape, smell, and death-ray attachment of choice that paralyzes your enemies with fear and envy!  Entire worlds will bow before your nether parts!  😲💪 😜  #Kindle #KindleUnlimited 

Give my books a read and a review!

DirtySciFiBuddha143 Comments

What the glory trap is happening, all you horny fucks who see an unattended hole in a decrepit bathroom and predictably think, hmm, yeah, this seems like a good idea, then proceed to unzip and stick the ol’ womb-hammer into the hole, suddenly it erupts with diagonally opposed mandibles surrounded by angry pink flesh that disturbingly looks like a vajeen from that fucked up dimension in Event Horizon, you scream in panic and stumble back, the rest of the wall breaks and crumbles, holy fuck it’s a goddamn Predator without its helmet, pointing and laughing at your fear-shriveled piece, it whips out a recording device, takes a couple pics, then walks out of the bathroom shaking its head as if to say what a stupid acorn-dicked human—

THAT, my friends, is why you keep your head on a swivel (both of them, in this case) when you’re perusing them glory holes!  You never know when some prank-driven interstellar menace will scare you with its genital-like mouth, then snapshot your terror-shrunken wiener so it can use you as comic relief amongst its Arnold-hunting buddies!  Jesus! 

Anyways, now that I’ve got your attention, let me direct it towards my various-genred books!  First up is my YA fantasy series, the Unbound Realm.  Volume 1 is A Door into Evermoor.  Paperback here: A Door into Evermoor, paperback.  I’ve just published volume 2:  Weapons of Old  If you’re hankering for some psychedelic high school fun with a giant side of interdimensional monsters and teen genius hijinks, check out Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl!  If you want a big ol’ helping of robot vs. wizard pew pew, along with an extra serving of existential philosophy, check out my science fiction series Echo!  And don’t forget to leave a positive review for them!  Positive reviews—even though they only take a minute or two of your time—are like $1000 tips for us indie authors.  Every one of them is SUPER appreciated!  #Kindle #KindleUnlimited #writingcommunity #writer #booktok #writerscommunity #writing

🙂 🙂 😀

Check out my sci-fi series: Echo!

DirtySciFiBuddha5 Comments

Echo is where I started my writing journey. The series has four books, and is filled with musings on society and existence, along with big doses of violence (especially in book 2) as well as psychic stuff and existential philosophy (book 3 and 4). You can see me get a firmer grip on dialogue, description, action, perspective, and symbolism as you progress through the series. #Kindle #KindleUnlimited #writingcommunity #writer #booktok #writerscommunity #writing

Here’s the link: Echo.

Get A Door into Evermoor here: A Door into Evermoor.  I’ve also published it in paperback!  Get it here:  A Door into Evermoor, paperbackGet Weapons of Old here: Weapons of Old Get Kor’Thank here:  Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl.  Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here:  Vol. 1 on Kindle.  Vol. 2 on Kindle here:  Vol.2 on Kindle  Vol. 3 on Kindle here:  Vol. 3 on Kindle  Vol.4 on Kindle here:  Vol. 4 on Kindle  Echo Omnibus here:  Echo Omnibus  Echo Vol. 1 & 2 Combined Edition here:  Combined Edition  Musings, Volume 1 is available here:  Musings, Volume 1  Here’s the miscellaneous gear that I use to try and become an uber-human:  Optimization! 🙂 🙂 😀    

Hold on!  I just got approved to be an Amazon affiliate!  If you’re going to buy ANY product from Amazon, and you’d like to support my efforts for absolutely free, then simply click on one of the Echo links I’ve provided—they’ll send you to Echo’s Amazon page—and THEN buy whatever product you wish.  Amazon gives me a small referral fee each time this happens!  In this manner you can support my books, musings, podcast, zany ads, or my adventures along the noble path known as The Way of The Man Child WITHOUT spending any more money than you were already going to!  Should you do this, I vow to send you a silent blessing, causing your genitals to adopt the optimum size, shape, smell, and death-ray attachment of choice that paralyzes your enemies with fear and envy!  Entire worlds will bow before your nether parts!  😲💪 😜   #Kindle  #KindleUnlimited #WritingCommunity

Musings

DirtySciFiBuddha16 Comments

I’ve noticed that when I relax into allowance, even if its of my own negativity (simply feeling it and letting it be, not acting on it or inflaming it with logical justifications or denials), it leads to neutrality, then positivity. This leads me to believe positivity is a default state. So instead of frantic rationalizations denying negativity, or teeth-grating insistence on feeling something more pleasant, I abide in negativity that organically arises, knowing it will reciprocate by allowing the reinstatement of my default positivity. It works for me, but maybe not everyone.

Check out my first YA Fantasy book: A Door into Evermoor, also now available in paperback!

DirtySciFiBuddha2 Comments

Check out my first venture into YA fantasy, also now available in paperback!  Jon’s a regular Earth kid who wants something more.  After he stumbles through an interdimensional portal, his wishes are granted in spectacular fashion!  During his journey, he encounters a Wolven King and an Elerican Witch, the last Wayfarer, and a half-Elf Princess!  All this and more in A Door into Evermoor!  #Kindle #KindleUnlimited #writingcommunity #writer #booktok #writerscommunity #writing

Check it out here: A Door into Evermoor.

Get A Door into Evermoor here:  A Door into Evermoor  Paperback here: A Door into Evermoor, paperback. Get Weapons of Old here:  Weapons of Old Get Kor’Thank here:  Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl.  Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here:  Vol. 1 on Kindle.  Vol. 2 on Kindle here:  Vol.2 on Kindle  Vol. 3 on Kindle here:  Vol. 3 on Kindle  Vol.4 on Kindle here:  Vol. 4 on Kindle  Echo Omnibus here:  Echo Omnibus  Echo Vol. 1 & 2 Combined Edition here:  Combined Edition  Musings, Volume 1 is available here:  Musings, Volume 1   Here’s the miscellaneous gear that I use to try and become an uber-human:  Optimization!🙂 🙂 😀

Yet another weird ad for my novels

DirtySciFiBuddha7 Comments

IN THE DISTANT FUTURE, WHEN GRAMMAR NAZIS CONTROL THE GODDAMN WORLD…

What the—am I in a ZOO EXHIBIT???

I run up to the glass and bang it with my fists.  “Hey!  HEY!  What in the FUCK?!?”

A bald, jawline-devoid, testosterone-deprived tour guide walks a group of schoolchildren up to my enclosure.  “With recent advances in genetic stabilization, we’ve successfully resurrected this blithering imbecile, personality and memory completely intact, right at the moment of his masturbation-induced death.  Behold the first viable recreation of the disgusting subspecies known as the Creatives, shortly before the Grammar Nazi Imperium came to power and cleansed the world of gibbering insanity.  Children, I present to you Kent Wayne, or, in more technical terms, Total idioticus.”

“Fuck you!”  I slam both middle fingers up against the glass.  “CHEW ON A BAG OF SMEG-COATED DICKS!”

“Come, children.”  The tour guide folds his hands behind his back.  “It isn’t advisable to spend too much time in his stupid-ass presence.” 

As they walk away, I start to hyperventilate.  They cloned me?  WHAT?  Like in Jurassic fucking Park?  I’m gonna live out my life in this twisted-ass freakshow???

Not a chance.  I reach in my pocket and open my eReader to a Kent Wayne novel, activating its mind-bending reality distortion powers.  Magic flash. 

Soccer Mom Prime jumps out of an interdimensional portal and smashes the glass with a spinning side kick.  Computerized alarms shriek and blare, coating the walls in flashing red light.  A second later, kitted-out guards form a semicircle and shoulder a bevy of space-age rifles.

Soccer Mom Prime rips out my ankle-length wiener, brandishing it like a vampire-repelling cross as we edge out of the cage.  “Back—BACK, you hamster-dicked fucks!”

The unsuspecting guards start clawing their eyes out, screaming like they’ve just caught a glimpse of Cthulu’s soul-wrecking asshole.  I’m puzzled by their response, until their team leader shouts, “Don’t look, goddammit!  Our Grammar Nazi minds are unable to process anything bigger than a single inch penis, due to our pedantic Smeagol-like nature!  Activate the battle-drone and instruct it to—AAAAHHHH!!!”  He drops to his knees, unsheathes a vibrating plasma dagger, and commits seppuku on the spot. 

My lips twitch in amusement.  Doesn’t matter if you try not to look—EVERYONE looks.  HEH heh heh!

“Come on!”  Soccer Mom Prime runs toward the exit, tugging me along by my big ol’ womb-hammer.  “I need to get LAID!”

I follow her lead, a shit-eating grin plastered wide on my face.  Right before we leave, I catch Jeff Goldblum’s eye—he’s sitting in an exhibit off to the side—and throw him a nod.

He returns my nod and mumbles, “Life, uh, finds a way.”

Damn straight, homie!  Kent Wayne wins again!

😀

Have Grammar Nazis interrupted your eternal rest, just so they can point and laugh at your creatively gifted mind?  Never fear!  Buy my books, break out of your cage, and give them Event Horizon-level trauma by showing off your brain-meltingly gorgeous genitals! 

Get A Door into Evermoor on kindle here: A Door into Evermoor. Paperback here: A Door into Evermoor, paperback.  Get Weapons of Old here: Weapons of Old Get Kor’Thank here:  Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl.  Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here:  Vol. 1 on Kindle.  Vol. 2 on Kindle here:  Vol.2 on Kindle  Vol. 3 on Kindle here:  Vol. 3 on Kindle  Vol.4 on Kindle here:  Vol. 4 on Kindle  Echo Omnibus here:  Echo Omnibus  Echo Vol. 1 & 2 Combined Edition here:  Combined Edition  Musings, Volume 1 is available here:  Musings, Volume 1  Here’s the miscellaneous gear that I use to try and become an uber-human:  Optimization!  🙂 🙂 😀

Hold on!  I just got approved to be an Amazon affiliate!  If you’re going to buy ANY product from Amazon, and you’d like to support my efforts for absolutely free, then simply click on one of the Echo links I’ve provided—they’ll send you to Echo’s Amazon page—and THEN buy whatever product you wish.  Amazon gives me a small referral fee each time this happens!  In this manner you can support my books, musings, zany ads, or my adventures along the noble path known as The Way of The Man Child WITHOUT spending any more money than you were already going to!  Should you do this, I vow to send you a silent blessing, causing your genitals to adopt the optimum size, shape, smell, and death-ray attachment of choice that paralyzes your enemies with fear and envy!  Entire worlds will bow before your nether parts!  😲💪 😜  #Kindle #KindleUnlimited #writingcommunity #writer #booktok #writerscommunity #writing

Check out my high school absurdical, Kor’Thank: Barbarian Valley Girl! (Yes, I know “absurdical” is a made up word)

DirtySciFiBuddha3 Comments

Idiot demon-jocks, tons of profanity, copious psychedelics, and an airborne kiss at 300 mph, hanging from the back of a mushroom-shaped mecha!  All this and more in my comedy/horror/sci-fi absurdical, Kor’Thank: Barbarian Valley Girl! #Kindle #KindleUnlimited #writingcommunity #writer #booktok #writerscommunity #writing

Check it out here: Kor’Thank: Barbarian Valley Girl

Get A Door into Evermoor here: A Door into Evermoor.  Paperback here: A Door into Evermoor, paperback.    Get Weapons of Old here:  Weapons of Old  Get Kor’Thank here:  Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl.  Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here:  Vol. 1 on Kindle.  Vol. 2 on Kindle here:  Vol.2 on Kindle  Vol. 3 on Kindle here:  Vol. 3 on Kindle  Vol.4 on Kindle here:  Vol. 4 on Kindle  Echo Omnibus here:  Echo Omnibus  Echo Vol. 1 & 2 Combined Edition here:  Combined Edition  Musings, Volume 1 is available here:  Musings, Volume 1  Here’s the miscellaneous gear that I use to try and become an uber-human:  Optimization!  🙂 🙂 😀

Hold on!  I just got approved to be an Amazon affiliate!  If you’re going to buy ANY product from Amazon, and you’d like to support my efforts for absolutely free, then simply click on one of the Echo links I’ve provided—they’ll send you to Echo’s Amazon page—and THEN buy whatever product you wish.  Amazon gives me a small referral fee each time this happens!  In this manner you can support my books, musings, zany ads, or my adventures along the noble path known as The Way of The Man Child WITHOUT spending any more money than you were already going to!  Should you do this, I vow to send you a silent blessing, causing your genitals to adopt the optimum size, shape, smell, and death-ray attachment of choice that paralyzes your enemies with fear and envy!  Entire worlds will bow before your nether parts!  😲💪 😜  #Kindle #KindleUnlimited 

Give my books a read and a review!

DirtySciFiBuddha11 Comments

What the rescue-cock is happening, all you wrongly accused meatslingers who’ve been framed by sinister parties and find yourself in court as the judge summarizes why you’re legally fucked, after which they lower their spectacles, look over the brim at you and ask if you have anything to say, sweat beads across your brow, how the fuck did it come to this, then in a sudden burst of inspiration and rage you whip your summer-sausage penis onto the table—ka-THUNK—as a defiant reply to their pathetic arguments, the room bursts into chaos, a riot breaks out, the judge hammers with their gavel and screams for order, bailiffs move in to detain you but you twist your hips and crack a skull with your dick, jab the other one’s eye, grab one of their necks from behind as your giant wiener quivers before their face ready to inflict a horrific skullfucking, you scream back, BACK MOTHERFUCKERS, and edge toward the exit with your newfound hostage, it’s time to go full-on action movie and embark on a harrowing quest to apprehend the real villain and clear your fucking name—

And THAT, my friends, is why you pick your friends carefully!  Who knows if your so-called buddy—the very same one who’s joking around with you in the opening scene while secretly giving you dirty narrow-eyed looks—is plotting to frame you and try to steal your girl while you’re rotting in prison?  Fuck that guy!

Anyways, now that I’ve got your attention, let me direct it towards my various-genred books!  First up is my YA fantasy series, the Unbound Realm.  Volume 1 is A Door into Evermoor.  Paperback here: A Door into Evermoor, paperback.  I’ve just published volume 2:  Weapons of Old  If you’re hankering for some psychedelic high school fun with a giant side of interdimensional monsters and teen genius hijinks, check out Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl!  If you want a big ol’ helping of robot vs. wizard pew pew, along with an extra serving of existential philosophy, check out my science fiction series Echo!  And don’t forget to leave a positive review for them!  Positive reviews—even though they only take a minute or two of your time—are like $1000 tips for us indie authors.  Every one of them is SUPER appreciated!  #Kindle #KindleUnlimited #writingcommunity #writer #booktok #writerscommunity #writing

🙂 🙂 😀

Check out my sci-fi series: Echo!

DirtySciFiBuddha5 Comments

Echo is where I started my writing journey. The series has four books, and is filled with musings on society and existence, along with big doses of violence (especially in book 2) as well as psychic stuff and existential philosophy (book 3 and 4). You can see me get a firmer grip on dialogue, description, action, perspective, and symbolism as you progress through the series. #Kindle #KindleUnlimited #writingcommunity #writer #booktok #writerscommunity #writing

Here’s the link: Echo.

Get A Door into Evermoor here: A Door into Evermoor.  I’ve also published it in paperback!  Get it here:  A Door into Evermoor, paperbackGet Weapons of Old here: Weapons of Old Get Kor’Thank here:  Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl.  Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here:  Vol. 1 on Kindle.  Vol. 2 on Kindle here:  Vol.2 on Kindle  Vol. 3 on Kindle here:  Vol. 3 on Kindle  Vol.4 on Kindle here:  Vol. 4 on Kindle  Echo Omnibus here:  Echo Omnibus  Echo Vol. 1 & 2 Combined Edition here:  Combined Edition  Musings, Volume 1 is available here:  Musings, Volume 1  Here’s the miscellaneous gear that I use to try and become an uber-human:  Optimization! 🙂 🙂 😀    

Hold on!  I just got approved to be an Amazon affiliate!  If you’re going to buy ANY product from Amazon, and you’d like to support my efforts for absolutely free, then simply click on one of the Echo links I’ve provided—they’ll send you to Echo’s Amazon page—and THEN buy whatever product you wish.  Amazon gives me a small referral fee each time this happens!  In this manner you can support my books, musings, podcast, zany ads, or my adventures along the noble path known as The Way of The Man Child WITHOUT spending any more money than you were already going to!  Should you do this, I vow to send you a silent blessing, causing your genitals to adopt the optimum size, shape, smell, and death-ray attachment of choice that paralyzes your enemies with fear and envy!  Entire worlds will bow before your nether parts!  😲💪 😜   #Kindle  #KindleUnlimited #WritingCommunity

Musings

DirtySciFiBuddha55 Comments

For most of my life, I’ve diminished my fulfillment through constant justification, as if someone was ceaselessly judging my every action, thought, and urge. Then I noticed that even when I “checked all the boxes,” it didn’t make me fulfilled, despite the fact that I’d satisfied all the logical requirements. Is that why I’m here? To play an incessant game of Simon Says? I’ve to believe my logical mind is like seasoning on a dish–it’s meant to complement the flavor of an entree, not drown it out altogether. By incorporating intuition, allowing myself to follow up on something that may not make immediate sense, I believe I am permitting the use of my entire consciousness, instead of utilizing half my wit.