Yet another weird ad for my novels

KCHOOM.  I rocket out of Kent’s wiener toward my long-awaited destiny.  I’m Kent21909348, one of billions of sperm in his Spermatazoic Marine Corps.  Pretty soon, I’m gonna make it to the egg and fulfill my calling.  My raison d’être is to become a fully formed human, and while I love my brother sperm, I’ll be damned if I let any of them get in my way. 

A few seconds in, I sense something’s off.  Everything around us is moist and soft, but it’s different from what the briefings described.  I can’t put my finger on it…

Suddenly, another sperm shouts, “We’re in a mouth—he shot us into a FUCKING MOUTH!”

In the blink of an eye, millions of sperm go from sprinting forward, to wriggling as hard as they can in the other direction.  Holy shit—there’s the uvula, looming over us like some evil fucking punching bag. 

I’m already tired from my initial sprint.  Now I’m fighting for my fucking survival.  Exhaustion metastasizes throughout my body, weighing me down with soul-killing fatigue. 

“SWIM HARDER!” a fellow sperm shouts.  “SHE’S GOING TO SWALL—”

GALUMPH.

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!”

Ten million sperm go down the hatch.  I fight back tears as their dying screams echo off the gums.  A Spermatazoic Marine meets my eyes, then shakes his head in a gesture of utter defeat.  I can’t believe it—it’s First Sergeant Kent93875604, one of the hardest sons of bitches to ever spawn from a testicle.  If he’s given up, we are well and truly fucked.

“I’m sorry, Kent21909348, I can’t keep going.  I—”

GALUMPH.

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!”

He just disappeared into the goddamn void.  As I glance around, I’m struck by dread—there’s only a hundred of us left.  Even if we make it out through the teeth, there’s no way in hell we’ll make it back to the balls.

Fuck it.  No options left.  I open my eReader to a Kent Wayne novel, activating its mind-bending reality distortion powers.  Magic flash. 

I’m teleported out of the hellish mouth-hole—now I’m rocketing through the air with a billion other sperm.  A split-second in, Kent yells, “No, don’t point it at my FACE—” and then a lady screams, “I’m sorry!  My hand cramped up and—”

We deluge Kent with its own damn Nasties.  Rope after rope of smelly goo lands right in his eye, splashing into his mouth and blasting up through his nose. 

“ACK!  THBBT!  SWEET FUCKING JESUS!”

As he flails and thrashes, ineffable joy rises up from within—we’re giving this dickhead a taste of his own medicine.  Fuck you, Kent.  You deserve this for killing us by the literal billions, sending wave after wave of us into mouths and buttholes, wads of tissues and unwashed socks.  I hope you burn, motherfucker.  I hope you—

…….

…………………………….

Are you a grunt in the Spermatazoic Marine Corps, convinced you have a ghost of a chance to become a fully formed human, but then your traitorous master shoots you into an irrelevant orifice?  Never fear!  Buy my books, tap into their reality-distorting powers, and deluge your host-body with his own nasty fluids!

Get A Door into Evermoor on kindle here: A Door into Evermoor. Paperback here: A Door into Evermoor, paperback.  Get Weapons of Old here: Weapons of Old Get Kor’Thank here:  Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl.  Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here:  Vol. 1 on Kindle.  Vol. 2 on Kindle here:  Vol.2 on Kindle  Vol. 3 on Kindle here:  Vol. 3 on Kindle  Vol.4 on Kindle here:  Vol. 4 on Kindle  Echo Omnibus here:  Echo Omnibus  Echo Vol. 1 & 2 Combined Edition here:  Combined Edition  Musings, Volume 1 is available here:  Musings, Volume 1 

Hold on!  I just got approved to be an Amazon affiliate!  If you’re going to buy ANY product from Amazon, and you’d like to support my efforts for absolutely free, then simply click on one of the Echo links I’ve provided—they’ll send you to Echo’s Amazon page—and THEN buy whatever product you wish.  Amazon gives me a small referral fee each time this happens!  In this manner you can support my books, musings, zany ads, or my adventures along the noble path known as The Way of The Man Child WITHOUT spending any more money than you were already going to!  Should you do this, I vow to send you a silent blessing, causing your genitals to adopt the optimum size, shape, smell, and death-ray attachment of choice that paralyzes your enemies with fear and envy!  Entire worlds will bow before your nether parts!  😲💪 😜  #Kindle #KindleUnlimited #writingcommunity #writer #booktok #writerscommunity #writing

Yet another weird ad for my novels

“Look at these he-Whore!”  Wonder Woman grabs my pecs, gives them both an appreciative heft, then sticks her tongue out for the camera as Lois snaps a couple pics.  “Tight like bongos!”  She drums them with horned-up coke-powered energy.

“Damn straight!”  Lois snorts a line off the top of my wiener.  “And look at this SCROTE!”  She gives it a tug, grabs hold and motorboats—BLBLBLBLBLBLBLBL—then raises her fists in a boxer’s guard.  “Like a couple a’ volleyballs in a burlap sack!  Imma use it for a goddamn speedbag!”

“Whoa!  Hey!”  I cup my nuts and take a quick step back.  “Easy on the volleyballs—that wasn’t included on the Man Whore Menu!”

“You’re no fun.”  She crosses her arms and pouts in disappointment.  “Whatever—gimme dat ASS!”  She grabs my hams and sinks her teeth in a buttcheek.

“OW!  Hey!”  I skip-hop away and clutch my rump.  “Easy!”  (These ladies are NUTS!)

“WHERE’S THE MAN WHORE???”  Catwoman busts in and cracks her whip.  “LET’S SEE THAT WOMB-HAMMER!”  She cracks her whip three more times, causing me to yelp and instinctively flinch. 

I raise my hands in a conciliatory gesture.  “All right ladies, let’s all take it down a—”

Batman and Superman bust through the ceiling.  “There he is!”  Bats levels a finger at my face.  “The one who laughs at our small-penised rage!”

“I KNEW it!” Superman’s eyes glow heat-vision red.  “We talked about this, Lois!”

My horned-up clients scatter like roaches. 

“Uh…hi.”  I wave with one hand and cup my peen with the other.  No dice—it bounces and dangles between my knees.  “Just gonna…”  I shuffle-step backward.  “I’m gonna GO.”

Superman turns into a blue-red blur.  Suddenly, he’s right behind me, shutting the door and blocking the exit.  Batman chucks a wire-lined batarang, wrapping me in coils of flexi-sectioned metal. 

 “You’ve done more damage than Joker, Luthor, and Darkseid combined.”  He cracks his knuckles and strides toward me.

“How the fuck is an orgasm DAMAGE?” I rage.  “Just because you two are packing the equivalent of a hamster-tail, made of some cheap-ass Temu-ordered extra-narrow silly-string—”

“SHUT IT!”  Superman zaps my bare naked ass.  As I jump and squeal, he tries (but fails) to stifle his agonized sobs. 

Batman draws an extra-long Batarang.  Wicked shine glides across its edge, then culminates and twinkles off its extra-sharp tip.  “After I decapitate your monstrous wiener, I’ll mount the head in the Batcave, next to the dinosaur and the giant fucking penny.”

Shit.  SHIT.  I didn’t sign up for this.  I’m just a working-class Man Whore, trynna keep the lights on and put food on the table.  Fuck it.  No options left.  So I fall/dive onto my side, allowing me to reach inside my crumpled pants and open my eReader to a Kent Wayne novel, activating its mind-bending reality distortion powers.  Magic flash. 

“Fucking turds!”  Martha Stewart jumps out of an interdimensional portal and hunches over like Wolverine, ready to go ape-shit crazy on a horde of disposable goons.  “You think you can bully my favorite Man Whore???  Try it against somebody your own damn power level!”  Her gaze kindles with demon-fired blaze. 

Batman and Superman start walking backward, holding their arms out in a lets-take-it-easy gesture.  “No problem, Martha.”  Superman chuckles nervously.  “Everyone knows you mastered the Dark Arts.  We’ll just be on our way and—”

“THE FUCK YOU WILL!” Martha roars.  She grabs me around my waist, then chucks me backward in a vicious suplex.  At the peak of her throw, she squeezes the base of my hole-widening dick, instantly making it rock fucking hard.  Her timing is perfect—my wiener pierces Superman’s eye, bursting it open like an overripe grape. 

“AAAGHHH!”  He sinks to his knees and clutches the air, fingers trembling in what-the-fuck horror.

Batman turns and tries to run, but she swings my dick in a short tight arc, tripping him with the pleasingly dark-colored shaft.  He rolls to and fro as she slashes my wiener up and down, cracking tile and the concrete beneath.  Bats scrambles to his feet, Martha threatens him with the swollen tip—

—“NOT IN THE FACE!”  He shields his mug with crossed forearms—

But it was all just a fake:  she yanks his skull onto my quivering peen, sending it through his left ear and out through his right. 

“Gave him an earful!”  She dusts off her hands and cackles gleefully.  “Get it?  Earful!  HA!”  She slaps her knee and howls with mirth.

Jesus.  CHRIST. 

Kent Wayne wins again…I think?

Have you pissed off a superhero through your Man Whore-ing duties?  Never fear!  Buy my books, summon Dark Martha, and give him an earful of your weaponized genitals!

Get A Door into Evermoor on kindle here: A Door into Evermoor. Paperback here: A Door into Evermoor, paperback.  Get Weapons of Old here: Weapons of Old Get Kor’Thank here:  Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl.  Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here:  Vol. 1 on Kindle.  Vol. 2 on Kindle here:  Vol.2 on Kindle  Vol. 3 on Kindle here:  Vol. 3 on Kindle  Vol.4 on Kindle here:  Vol. 4 on Kindle  Echo Omnibus here:  Echo Omnibus  Echo Vol. 1 & 2 Combined Edition here:  Combined Edition  Musings, Volume 1 is available here:  Musings, Volume 1 

Hold on!  I just got approved to be an Amazon affiliate!  If you’re going to buy ANY product from Amazon, and you’d like to support my efforts for absolutely free, then simply click on one of the Echo links I’ve provided—they’ll send you to Echo’s Amazon page—and THEN buy whatever product you wish.  Amazon gives me a small referral fee each time this happens!  In this manner you can support my books, musings, zany ads, or my adventures along the noble path known as The Way of The Man Child WITHOUT spending any more money than you were already going to!  Should you do this, I vow to send you a silent blessing, causing your genitals to adopt the optimum size, shape, smell, and death-ray attachment of choice that paralyzes your enemies with fear and envy!  Entire worlds will bow before your nether parts!  😲💪 😜  #Kindle #KindleUnlimited #writingcommunity #writer #booktok #writerscommunity #writing

Yet another weird ad for my novels

Thinking of milfs, jerking the meat, HERE IT CO—

Right as I bust, Chuck Norris sprints through the door and grabs my wiener.

“What in the FUCK?!?”  I shove him back and look down in horror.  It’s already shriveled into an acorn-sized nub.

“Ha!”  He puts his hands on his hips.  “Turned ya gay, ya communist pedo!  Now do what I say or I’ll tell everyone the truth!”

I buckle my pants and narrow my eyes at him.  “That…is not how any of that works.  None of those lies have anything to do with what you just did.  In fact, I could call the cops and have you arrested for assault.”

“Oh.”  He looks crestfallen.  “Uh…anyways, wanna help me save the world?”

“You couldn’t have just asked?” 

He scratches his head, looks nervously off to the side, and hisses through his teeth.  “I…uh…I just…”

“Let’s go.  Fucking idiot.”

ONE HOUR LATER…

“THERE!”  Chuck Norris hollers extra loud, so I can hear him over the WHUP-WHUP-WHUP of our helicopter’s rotors.  “THEY’RE SHITTING RED INK ON EVERYTHING THEY CAN FIND!”  He points at a horde of Grammar Nazis, excreting red liquid on phones, laptops, and any other writing utensil that happens to be within reach. 

“HOW DO YOU KNOW IT’S INK?” I shout.  “IT COULD JUST BE HEMORRHOIDS OR—”

“I TASTED IT!  IT’S DEFINITELY INK!”

Before I can express my undying disgust, he leaps off the skid, screams EHHHHH-HOOOOOO!!! and lands in their midst.  He throws a few of his trademark roundhouse kicks before he vanishes under a sea of balding pates, jawline-devoid faces, and pasty-skinned claws. 

“KENT!  HALP!”  I catch a glimpse of his sleeveless arm, poking out of his 80s denim vest, before a dozen more Grammar Nazis pile onto his torso. 

Fuck.  My wiener still looks like a frightened hamster tail, thanks to Chuck’s karate-roughened touch.  It’s my only weapon of any note, and I need to access it post fucking haste. 

Only one option left.  I open my eReader to a Kent Wayne novel, activating its mind-bending reality distortion powers.  Magic flash. 

My wiener instantly grows to its normal length.  Typically, I keep it coiled around my leg and tucked in my sock.  Right now, that would defeat the purpose of bringing it out of its coma, so I let it dangle as we swoop in low.  It roars in fury as it bludgeons hundreds of Grammar Nazis, clearing the streets of pedantic dorks.  Some get caught in the smegma-ridden folds—they claw the air with upturned hands, screaming like banshees as their faces melt off their Gollum-like skulls. 

Chuck scrabbles onto a goo-free section of my ponderous shaft.  “Good lord!” he exclaims.  “That is a LOT of stripper pimples!” 

I shrug in resignation.  “Their perfume is cheap.  Not the best when it comes to healthy pores.” 

He meets my eyes with a hopeful gaze.  “After we’re done here, do you wanna do nekkid bicep curls while staring at our bodies in a full-length mirr—”

“NO.”

He scowls and grumbles, “Communist pussy.”

Has Chuck Norris bumbled into your life, ham-handedly attempted to blackmail you with an act that should get him locked up in prison, then asked for your help with saving the world?  Never fear!  Buy my books, unleash the power of your unstoppable genitals, and hold back a tide of jawline-devoid Grammar Nazis!

Get A Door into Evermoor on kindle here: A Door into Evermoor. Paperback here: A Door into Evermoor, paperback.  Get Weapons of Old here: Weapons of Old Get Kor’Thank here:  Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl.  Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here:  Vol. 1 on Kindle.  Vol. 2 on Kindle here:  Vol.2 on Kindle  Vol. 3 on Kindle here:  Vol. 3 on Kindle  Vol.4 on Kindle here:  Vol. 4 on Kindle  Echo Omnibus here:  Echo Omnibus  Echo Vol. 1 & 2 Combined Edition here:  Combined Edition  Musings, Volume 1 is available here:  Musings, Volume 1 

Hold on!  I just got approved to be an Amazon affiliate!  If you’re going to buy ANY product from Amazon, and you’d like to support my efforts for absolutely free, then simply click on one of the Echo links I’ve provided—they’ll send you to Echo’s Amazon page—and THEN buy whatever product you wish.  Amazon gives me a small referral fee each time this happens!  In this manner you can support my books, musings, zany ads, or my adventures along the noble path known as The Way of The Man Child WITHOUT spending any more money than you were already going to!  Should you do this, I vow to send you a silent blessing, causing your genitals to adopt the optimum size, shape, smell, and death-ray attachment of choice that paralyzes your enemies with fear and envy!  Entire worlds will bow before your nether parts!  😲💪 😜  #Kindle #KindleUnlimited #writingcommunity #writer #booktok #writerscommunity #writing

Yet another weird ad for my novels

Holy shit, I never thought I’d ever be invited into the motherfucking Justice League!  All I got going for me is multiple awards as a dick-slanging Man Whore.  I mean, I know a bit of jiu-jitsu and I own some nun-chuks, but…

A voice drifts down the Watchtower hallway.  “I am vengeance…”

Whoa, is that BATMAN?  He must be practicing his Dark Knight monologue!  Bad.  ASS.  Man, I hope I get to come up with some personalized catchphrases!  I could punch a villain in his evil fucking face, then loom over him and rasp, “Your mother paid me for sex.”  No, that’s too on the nose.  It’s on brand, but I need to think of something a little more—

“I am the night…” 

He’s gonna say it!  I break into a sprint, homing in on the door at the end of the hall.  Can’t miss out on one of the most iconic spiels in the history of—

“I.  AM.  BATMAN!”

As I yank the door open, I watch in horror as he grips his dick and levels it at a Catwoman-shaped blowup doll (markedly more on the feline side than hot-lady-in-latex).  Jizz-ropes splatter its face, neck, and chest, desecrating it with off-color splotches of cum.

For a long moment, we both lock eyes.  Crickets.

Then he points a quivering finger at me.  “You…YOU…”

I raise my hands in a I-didn’t-see-NOTHING gesture.  “Um…it’s 2025, so you can fuck whatever you want, as long as it doesn’t break any laws.”

“LOOK AT IT!”  He grabs his thimble-sized wiener and levels it at my face.  “IT’S PATHETIC!!!”

“Agh!”  I shield my face with my hands.  “Gross!”

“It’s why I train so hard and beat the shit out of criminals, instead of using my wealth to induce societally meaningful change and reform!  NO ONE CAN KNOW!”  240 lbs of costumed incel comes charging at me, murder shining in his bat-cowled eyes.

Holy FUCK.  This wall-punching rage-hole is gonna rip my arms off, and possibly desecrate my skull with his hamster-tail wiener!  So I open my eReader to a Kent Wayne novel, activating its mind-bending reality distortion powers.  Magic flash. 

Wonder Woman speed-blurs into the room.  “I KNEW IT!”  She points at his groin, causing him to bow his knees in and cover it with both hands.  “THAT’S why you’re so good at eating vajeen!  Well guess what, thimble-dick, you ain’t foolin’ NOBODY!”

“No it’s just cold!  If you warm it up with a heated compress—”

“You think you can murder the competition, and deprive us womenfolk of this master penetrator?”  She flings a hand at me (master penetrator—I could get used to that).  “Guy’s built like a baby’s arm holding an apple, offering it up to the goddamn heavens!”  She reaches behind her, draws a lightsaber-sized dildo, and thumbs the on switch, activating its chainsaw-style gamut of vibrating studs.  As they loop continuously around the shaft, her dildo-sword erupts with a butt-puckering RRRRMMMMM.

“Diana, please!”  He starts walking backwards, both hands out in a warding gesture.  “I’ll leave him al—AHGODNO!”

Before I run out the door, I give him a big smile and a wave.  Then I make a hole with my left index finger and thumb, and bust through it with my right fist while splaying out the fingers.  That’s right shitstain—you’re about to experience what it’s like to give birth from the back end, courtesy of that dildo-sword giving you the hole-widening bid’ness! 

Kent Wayne wins again!  HEH heh heh! 

😀

Have you walked in on a micro-dicked superhero, and triggered his world-crushing inferiority-powered rage?  Never fear!  Buy my books, summon Wonder Woman, and give that dude the hole-widening bid’ness! 

Get A Door into Evermoor on kindle here: A Door into Evermoor. Paperback here: A Door into Evermoor, paperback.  Get Weapons of Old here: Weapons of Old Get Kor’Thank here:  Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl.  Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here:  Vol. 1 on Kindle.  Vol. 2 on Kindle here:  Vol.2 on Kindle  Vol. 3 on Kindle here:  Vol. 3 on Kindle  Vol.4 on Kindle here:  Vol. 4 on Kindle  Echo Omnibus here:  Echo Omnibus  Echo Vol. 1 & 2 Combined Edition here:  Combined Edition  Musings, Volume 1 is available here:  Musings, Volume 1 

Hold on!  I just got approved to be an Amazon affiliate!  If you’re going to buy ANY product from Amazon, and you’d like to support my efforts for absolutely free, then simply click on one of the Echo links I’ve provided—they’ll send you to Echo’s Amazon page—and THEN buy whatever product you wish.  Amazon gives me a small referral fee each time this happens!  In this manner you can support my books, musings, zany ads, or my adventures along the noble path known as The Way of The Man Child WITHOUT spending any more money than you were already going to!  Should you do this, I vow to send you a silent blessing, causing your genitals to adopt the optimum size, shape, smell, and death-ray attachment of choice that paralyzes your enemies with fear and envy!  Entire worlds will bow before your nether parts!  😲💪 😜  #Kindle #KindleUnlimited #writingcommunity #writer #booktok #writerscommunity #writing

Yet another weird ad for my novels

“Oh, that’s interesting, Kent.”  My fifth-grade teacher studies my play-doh sculpture.  “A cross between a star destroyer…and a penis.”  Her brow wrinkles in consternation.

“SUPER star destroyer,” I correct.  “This is an Executor-class Dreadnought.  They were present at the Battles of Mako-Ta, Jekara, and Yavin.  Most of the manufacturing took place at Kuat Drive Yards, during the reign of the Galactic—”

“Nerd!”  Tanner Aken, class bully and pubescently-accelerated douchebag, points a finger at my play-doh masterpiece and looks around at his cronies.  “Minions—now is the time!” 

A horde of kids rush my teacher, forcing her out the door and locking it behind her.  Then they close in, darkening my starfighter craft with their encroaching shadows. 

I rise to my feet, holding up my hands in a conciliatory gesture.  “Easy, fuckers—nobody has to die today.  Stand down before I pull your large intestines out from your mouth, small intestines out from your ass, and use your bodies as a bunch of fucked-up jump ropes.”

Tanner brays out laughter.  “We have you outnumbered a dozen to one!  What are you gonna do, asswipe?”  His neander-fuck friends burst into giggles, as if he just delivered a world-class insult, and start giving each other high-fives and chest bumps. 

I point at the shitstain to his left.  “Qris Norvell.  Your dad gets pegged while he’s wearing a wolf suit.  I taped it from my bedroom window.”  Then the one on my far right flank.  “Odyssey Whittle.  Your mom’s been dipping into your Adderall.  When she can’t fill the scrip, she blows the local dealer and scores a little extra.”  Back to the left, three douchebags over.  “Tackle Jefferson.  The bank’s foreclosing on your soulless Mcmansion.  In a couple of months, your parents’ effort to keep up with the Jones’s will lead to a giant fiscal shit in their budgetary mouths.”  Qris, Odyssey, and Tackle start hitching and sobbing.  I shoot them all a malevolent grin.  “Only a matter of time before your moms start banging their big-dicked tennis trainers.  And for the love of fuck, change your names.  You all sound like a church-grown boy band that failed at their debut and turned into a bunch of roofie-slinging frat bo—”

“ENOUGH!”  Tanner levels a finger at my face.  “RIP HIM APART!”

No options left.  So I open my eReader to a Kent Wayne novel, activating its mind-bending reality distortion powers.  Magic flash. 

All of existence opens before me.  I direct my intent through some different possibilities, collapse a series of quantum potentials…

Voila!  I’ve aged twenty five years in the span of a second.  Not only that, but my enemies’ moms have materialized before me, groping my big ol’ peen as it bounces between my knees like the dude at the end of an extra-springy bungee rope. 

“I’m sick of you brats!”  Qris’s mom drops to her knees and smacks my girthy upcurve on her outstretched tongue.  “Gonna get me a much-deserved widening from this grade-A Man Whore!” 

As my enemies burst into hysterical tears, I give them an it-is-what-it-is, that’s-the-way-the-cookie-crumbles type of shrug.  “Shouldn’t have made fun of me for my Executor-class Star Destroyer.”

Kent Wayne wins again!  HEH heh heh!

😀

Have douche-bros in training condemned and persecuted you for your high-culture tastes?  Never fear!  Buy my books, widen their moms, and make them regret their neander-fuck ways!

Get A Door into Evermoor on kindle here: A Door into Evermoor. Paperback here: A Door into Evermoor, paperback.  Get Weapons of Old here: Weapons of Old Get Kor’Thank here:  Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl.  Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here:  Vol. 1 on Kindle.  Vol. 2 on Kindle here:  Vol.2 on Kindle  Vol. 3 on Kindle here:  Vol. 3 on Kindle  Vol.4 on Kindle here:  Vol. 4 on Kindle  Echo Omnibus here:  Echo Omnibus  Echo Vol. 1 & 2 Combined Edition here:  Combined Edition  Musings, Volume 1 is available here:  Musings, Volume 1 

Hold on!  I just got approved to be an Amazon affiliate!  If you’re going to buy ANY product from Amazon, and you’d like to support my efforts for absolutely free, then simply click on one of the Echo links I’ve provided—they’ll send you to Echo’s Amazon page—and THEN buy whatever product you wish.  Amazon gives me a small referral fee each time this happens!  In this manner you can support my books, musings, zany ads, or my adventures along the noble path known as The Way of The Man Child WITHOUT spending any more money than you were already going to!  Should you do this, I vow to send you a silent blessing, causing your genitals to adopt the optimum size, shape, smell, and death-ray attachment of choice that paralyzes your enemies with fear and envy!  Entire worlds will bow before your nether parts!  😲💪 😜  #Kindle #KindleUnlimited #writingcommunity #writer #booktok #writerscommunity #writing