I’m at a free meditation class.  I’m doing my thing, zen-ing out, when I’m interrupted by a loud harrumph.  I open my eyes and see the group smirking and giggling at me.  “What?” I ask, my irritation growing steadily.  “You don’t have any crystals,” one of them says.  “And you’re not wearing a tie-dyed shirt.…

I’m doing some friendly grappling, and in walks a Bro.  We’re drilling arm bars and he’s working one on me when a loud fart rips from him and damn near peels the skin off my face.  I flinch like I’ve been shot.  He’s laughing hysterically.  My vision floods with watery tears and my hearing fades…

I’m wandering through an art museum, not seeing what the big deal is (no offense against fine art; I just prefer the work of comic-book legends Jim Lee, Glenn Fabry and Stan Sakai) when a bunch of hipster-artists (wearing berets and scarves of course) scoff at me.  I turn and raise my eyebrows.  “There a…