Thank you, Recent Kor’Thank Purchasers!

Skib Skab SkerNoob!  I see a few more peeps have bought my zany sci-fi teen absurdical, Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl!  Thank you lots, my fellow consciousnesses-bound-to-a-meat-body-that’s-hurtling-through-space-on-a-lava-cored-dirt-sphere!

I threw a buncha teen tropes into this one–horror-movie monsters, body-mind switcheroos, prom-night insanity–along with a bunch of stuff that’s pure Kent Wayne!  Psychedelics, mushroom-shaped mechas, velociraptor-riding barbarians, and (of course) tons of profanity!  Enjoy!

Get Kor’Thank here:  Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl.  Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here:  Vol. 1 on Kindle.  Vol. 2 on Kindle here:  Vol.2 on Kindle  Vol. 3 on Kindle here:  Vol. 3 on Kindle  Vol.4 on Kindle here:  Vol. 4 on Kindle  Echo Omnibus here:  Echo Omnibus  Echo Vol. 1 & 2 Combined Edition here:  Combined Edition  Musings, Volume 1 is available here:  Musings, Volume 1  If you wanna hear me babble on about anything and everything, and strain my FREAKIN’ BRAIN, then here’s a link to my podcast:  Strained Brains!  It is on iTunes, Stitcher, Spotify, and Google Play!  Please give it a listen and a five-star review!  Here’s the miscellaneous gear that I use to try and become an uber-human:  Optimization!  🙂 🙂 😀

The Prologue for the Unbound Realm is UP!

Check out the prologue for book 1 of the Unbound Realm, my work-in-process YA fantasy series!  Here’s the link:  Prologue for the Unbound Realm

Get Kor’Thank here:  Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl.  Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here:  Vol. 1 on Kindle.  Vol. 2 on Kindle here:  Vol.2 on Kindle  Vol. 3 on Kindle here:  Vol. 3 on Kindle  Vol.4 on Kindle here:  Vol. 4 on Kindle  Echo Omnibus here:  Echo Omnibus  Echo Vol. 1 & 2 Combined Edition here:  Combined Edition  Musings, Volume 1 is available here:  Musings, Volume 1  If you wanna hear me babble on about anything and everything, and strain my FREAKIN’ BRAIN, then here’s a link to my podcast:  Strained Brains!  It is on iTunes, Stitcher, Spotify, and Google Play!  Please give it a listen and a five-star review!  Here’s the miscellaneous gear that I use to try and become an uber-human:  Optimization!  🙂 🙂 😀

Echo: A Dystopian Science Fiction Novel

[Outer God Kent] Nyarlathotep telepathically projects to me.  [You haven’t driven enough mortals insane, and your tentacle game is looking a little weak.]

[What the fuck are you talking about?] I project back.  [I’ve drawn billions into the Infinite Abyss, then drunk their souls with my astral proboscis.  Maybe you should spend a little less time fisting your monstrous holes and a little more time doing your job.]

[The jig is up, Kent.  We know you haven’t done your job for several eons.  Instead, you’ve been writing stoopid-ass science fiction and incarnating as a super-hot dude who seduces Soccer Moms with his unbelievably beautiful pork sword.]

Shit.  They’re on to me.  FUCK these assholes!  Always gibbering about the Great Rending, or the Ruining of Worlds.  I wanna have SEX, goddammit!  And who cares if I like writing about robo-suits and gatling lasers—I’m an artisté, bitch!

So I open my mind to Echo, activating the sci-fi epic’s reality distortion powers.  Magic flash.

[Oh no.  NO.  This will not do at ALL!]  A stern, sexy voice echoes throughout the aether.

Oh shit—it’s Soccer Mom Prime!

[I was just kidding, Soccer Mom Prime!]  The dark god Nyarlathotep projects a nervous laugh.  [I would never cross minds with you—you’re far too strong!]

[Damn straight I am!] she thunders.  [And no one—I mean NO ONE—is gonna deprive me of the sweet dicking down that only Kent Wayne and his upcurved wiener are solely capable of!  Now fuck off back to the Deep!]

As Nyarlathotep seeps back into Void, Soccer Mom Prime beckons me over with her mind.

[Let’s go, Man Whore.  I didn’t go astral so I could sit around and wait for multiversal heat death.  Get yer pants off and let’s get to boffing!]

Can’t argue with that!

😀

*70s porn music*

 

 

Are you a former Lurker of the Cosmos who wants to quit all the Doom and Wrath bullshit and get your genitals wet?  Never fear!  Get Kor’Thank here:  Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl.  Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here:  Vol. 1 on Kindle.  Vol. 2 on Kindle here:  Vol.2 on Kindle  Vol. 3 on Kindle here:  Vol. 3 on Kindle  Vol.4 on Kindle here:  Vol. 4 on Kindle  Echo Omnibus here:  Echo Omnibus  Echo Vol. 1 & 2 Combined Edition here:  Combined Edition  Musings, Volume 1 is available here:  Musings, Volume 1  If you wanna hear me babble on about anything and everything, and strain my FREAKIN’ BRAIN, then here’s a link to my podcast:  Strained Brains!  It is on iTunes, Stitcher, Spotify, and Google Play!  Please give it a listen and a five-star review!  Here’s the miscellaneous gear that I use to try and become an uber-human:  Optimization!  🙂 🙂 😀

Thank You, Recent Kor’Thank Purchasers!!!

BerKoom!  The first copies of Kor’Thank go flying off the digital shelves!  To whoever bought em, I say Thank You Muchly!!!

Get Kor’Thank here:  Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl.  Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here:  Vol. 1 on Kindle.  Vol. 2 on Kindle here:  Vol.2 on Kindle  Vol. 3 on Kindle here:  Vol. 3 on Kindle  Vol.4 on Kindle here:  Vol. 4 on Kindle  Echo Omnibus here:  Echo Omnibus  Echo Vol. 1 & 2 Combined Edition here:  Combined Edition  Musings, Volume 1 is available here:  Musings, Volume 1  If you wanna hear me babble on about anything and everything, and strain my FREAKIN’ BRAIN, then here’s a link to my podcast:  Strained Brains!  It is on iTunes, Stitcher, Spotify, and Google Play!  Please give it a listen and a five-star review!  Here’s the miscellaneous gear that I use to try and become an uber-human:  Optimization!  🙂 🙂 😀

Check out my podcast: Strained Brains!

GerThoogenBoogers!  Check out my podcast:  Strained Brains!  I interview my best buddies, alternative medicine practitioners, military “elite,” a massage therapist who grew up in the third world and started a thriving business in America, along with a whole lot more!  Give it a listen by following the links on this page: Strained Brains Podcast.

Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here:  Vol. 1 on Kindle.  Vol. 2 on Kindle here:  Vol.2 on Kindle  Vol. 3 on Kindle here:  Vol. 3 on Kindle  Vol.4 on Kindle here:  Vol. 4 on Kindle  Echo Omnibus here:  Echo Omnibus  Echo Vol. 1 & 2 Combined Edition here:  Combined Edition  Musings, Volume 1 is available here:  Musings, Volume 1  If you wanna hear me babble on about anything and everything, and strain my FREAKIN’ BRAIN, then here’s a link to my podcast:  Strained Brains!  It is on iTunes, Stitcher, Spotify, and Google Play!  Please give it a listen and a five-star review!  Here’s the miscellaneous gear that I use to try and become an uber-human:  Optimization!  🙂 🙂 😀

Musings

Creativity is the mental lever which turns problems into opportunities.  Or it can be a giant anchor; it can be used to find futility in every circumstance.

Get Kor’Thank here:  Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl.  Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here:  Vol. 1 on Kindle.  Vol. 2 on Kindle here:  Vol.2 on Kindle  Vol. 3 on Kindle here:  Vol. 3 on Kindle  Vol.4 on Kindle here:  Vol. 4 on Kindle  Echo Omnibus here:  Echo Omnibus  Echo Vol. 1 & 2 Combined Edition here:  Combined Edition  Musings, Volume 1 is available here:  Musings, Volume 1  If you wanna hear me babble on about anything and everything, and strain my FREAKIN’ BRAIN, then here’s a link to my podcast:  Strained Brains!  It is on iTunes, Stitcher, Spotify, and Google Play!  Please give it a listen and a five-star review!  Here’s the miscellaneous gear that I use to try and become an uber-human:  Optimization!  🙂 🙂 😀

Kor’Thank is out on Amazon!

Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl is finally out on Amazon!  Here’s the link:  Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl.

Sure, I feel proud of all the blood-n-guts, robo-psychic-philosophical drama I put into Echo, but I believe being a writer is all about expanding my repertoire (in addition to crafting the best story I possibly can).  That’s why my new book, Kor’Thank, is less about dystopian violence and more about ridiculous high school fun (Kent Wayne-style of course; it’s got tons of swearing, psychedelics, interdimensional mushroom-mechas, an evil cheerleader that switches bodies with a barbarian king from another dimension, and a whole lot more).

Hope you enjoy!

Get Kor’Thank here:  Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl.  Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here:  Vol. 1 on Kindle.  Vol. 2 on Kindle here:  Vol.2 on Kindle  Vol. 3 on Kindle here:  Vol. 3 on Kindle  Vol.4 on Kindle here:  Vol. 4 on Kindle  Echo Omnibus here:  Echo Omnibus  Echo Vol. 1 & 2 Combined Edition here:  Combined Edition  Musings, Volume 1 is available here:  Musings, Volume 1  If you wanna hear me babble on about anything and everything, and strain my FREAKIN’ BRAIN, then here’s a link to my podcast:  Strained Brains!  It is on iTunes, Stitcher, Spotify, and Google Play!  Please give it a listen and a five-star review!  Here’s the miscellaneous gear that I use to try and become an uber-human:  Optimization!  🙂 🙂 😀