What the beast-hole is going on, all you sexual adventurers who’ve decided to enter into this dark, new-fangled universe of licking your partner’s butt, but now you’re staring right into its depths questioning your life choices and goddammit they fucked up shaving, left a few scraggles so you say hold on a sec, grab a magic marker, then draw an evil hairy spider with their anus as the torso, cap it off with a bunch of glaring red eyes to which they scream WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING—
Hey hey HEY! Just because your partner isn’t good with a razor, that does NOT mean you can draw an arachnid on their butthole! Save that shit for passed-out frat-bros!
Anyways, now that I’ve got your attention, let me direct it towards my various-genred books! First up is my YA fantasy: A Door into Evermoor. If you’re hankering for some psychedelic high school fun with a giant side of interdimensional monsters and teen genius hijinks, check out Kor’Thank: Barbarian Valley Girl! If you want a big ol’ helping of robot vs. wizard pew pew, along with an extra serving of existential philosophy, check out my science fiction series Echo! And don’t forget to leave a positive review for them! Positive reviews—even though they only take a minute or two of your time—are like $1000 tips for us indie authors. Every one of them is SUPER appreciated! #WritingCommunity
🙂 🙂 😀