Musings

One day, I realized the material things I desired—even if I got every single one of them—weren’t guaranteed to bring me happiness, and that I desired these things because I thought they would make me happy.

And then I realized my feelings were like muscles.  How even though I couldn’t stretch anger into joy, I could massage it into something looser—boredom or apathy—and work my way up from there.  I could distract my negativity with appreciation of something I had no opinion about:  the color of my floor or the hum of the fan.

And then I realized happiness wasn’t a function of my material achievements, it was a function of my gradual focus.

(Ironically, the more positive my focus, the more positive things seem to happen to me, without me having to pay the price or exert massive amounts of effort.)

28 thoughts on “Musings

  1. I don’t like sounding all psychobabble, but it is funny how your mindset – or exercising some mindfulness and focusing on the small things – like the hum of the fan, that’s a good one – helps shift how you feel about things, isn’t it?

    Take care!

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  2. It might dishearten some the fact that we make ourselves happy. Not even loved ones can change our mood if we don’t want to, but the effects are exponential when we do. I agree. Cheers and thanks for the inspiration.

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  3. The ownership of material stuff is an illusion, because somebody stronger or more predatory can always come along and take what you have… And we certainly don’t get to keep it when we die. People can try to break others mentally and take away their ability to find joy even there. But I agree with the best path to happiness any of us has is to recognize our own ability to choose our attitudes and to shift our focus away from defining our joys and successes by what we own. There is great power in knowing there is something within each of us that is worth fighting the darkness of life for. Hope life is treating you kindly😊 Ari

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    • Indeed! And even if we have it, we can still use it as an excuse to be miserable. I’ve been happy in “miserable” circumstances, and miserable in “happy” circumstances.

      Life has been treating me pretty good! I hope it has for you as well! 😁

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      • Really, that is true. “Stuff” isn’t really what brings true happiness in life. I have seen and experienced that myself. And I’m glad to hear that life has been treating you pretty good! 😀 I’m currently getting strangled by my schedule for the next couple weeks, and while I quipped to another blogger that it was probably going to leave my strangled body in a proverbial back alley by Friday, I’m actually expecting to make it out alive and come up for a breath of fresh air or two… sometime. Maybe after Christmas at this point. Otherwise, doing as fabulous as I can be doing. Take good care of yourself 😊

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      • Awesome! If it gets too intense, I find the “fuck it,” vibe is of great use. Or in other words, keep on chugging along and just let life have its way with me without getting knotted up over the outcome. I hope your schedule eases up unexpectedly or maybe gives you some unexpected benefits! 🙂

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      • I had to adopt the “fuck it” mentality several years back. The list of what needs to be done in my world is always significantly longer than what I or any one person can actually accomplish without a significant amount paid helpers. Which I do not have. So, already there in the land of “fuck it I can’t possibly worry about this or it will eat me alive”….

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