Kor’Thank: A High School Absurdical

Is butt-stuff that great?  I keep seeing articles about it pop up on my feed…

Time to find out.

I take a deep breath and lube up my index finger.

In the hole it goes…hmm…so far, it feels like I’m taking a giant shit.  Not impressed.

Then my finger locks in place.  What the fuck?  Can’t…pull it…OUT…

An evil voice laughs into my mind:  [Ooh hoo ha ha!  OH HO HO HO!!]

[Who are you?] I think desperately.  [WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY GODDAMN FINGER?]

[I’m hurt, Kent.  Don’t you recognize your lifelong enemy?]  A grinning, cadaver-like face flashes through my mind.  No jawline, receded hair, and ugly as fuck.

Oh no!  It’s Grammar Nazi Prime!

[It took the better part of two years, but I managed to plant a hypnotic suggestion in your pea-brained psyche.  That bottle of lube you bought is no accident.  It’s filled with nanotech robots—your gross motor movements are now under my complete control.]

[GO FUCK YOURSELF!] I project.

[Funny—I was about to say the same to you.]  His grin grows wider.  [Prepare for the second finger.]

[No—NO!]  Sweat breaks out across my brow.  My eyes tick back and forth as I try to think of something—ANYTHING—that’ll stop this bastard from widening my b-hole!

Then my middle finger starts worming its way in.  Fuck it.  No options left.  I open my eReader to Kor’Thank, activating its reality distortion powers.  Magic flash.

My eyes steel over.  [Prepare to reap the whirlwind.]  My finger finds the magic button inside my rectum and gives it a push.  The foulest, stinkiest, evilest cum in the history of ejacs shoots from my wiener and teleports into Grammar Nazi Prime’s secret hideout, deluging his face with my asparagus-tainted load.

[AAAAH!!!!  AHGODITBURNSSSSSS!!!!!]

That’s what you get for your anal trickery!  HEH heh heh!  Kent Wayne wins again!

😀

Has your mortal enemy tricked you into rooting around in your nasty-ass dirt star?  Never fear!  Get Kor’Thank here:  Kor’Thank:  Barbarian Valley Girl.  Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here:  Vol. 1 on Kindle.  Vol. 2 on Kindle here:  Vol.2 on Kindle  Vol. 3 on Kindle here:  Vol. 3 on Kindle  Vol.4 on Kindle here:  Vol. 4 on Kindle  Echo Omnibus here:  Echo Omnibus  Echo Vol. 1 & 2 Combined Edition here:  Combined Edition  Musings, Volume 1 is available here:  Musings, Volume 1  If you wanna hear me babble on about anything and everything, and strain my FREAKIN’ BRAIN, then here’s a link to my podcast:  Strained Brains!  It is on iTunes, Stitcher, Spotify, and Google Play!  Please give it a listen and a five-star review!  Here’s the miscellaneous gear that I use to try and become an uber-human:  Optimization!  🙂 🙂 😀

Hold on!  I just got approved to be an Amazon affiliate!  If you’re going to buy ANY product from Amazon, and you’d like to support my efforts for absolutely free, then simply click on one of the Echo links I’ve provided—they’ll send you to Echo’s Amazon page—and THEN buy whatever product you wish.  Amazon gives me a small referral fee each time this happens!  In this manner you can support my books, musings, podcast, zany ads, or my adventures along the noble path known as The Way of The Man Child WITHOUT spending any more money than you were already going to!  Should you do this, I vow to send you a silent blessing, causing your genitals to adopt the optimum size, shape, smell, and death-ray attachment of choice that paralyzes your enemies with fear and envy!  Entire worlds will bow before your nether parts!  😲💪 😜  #Kindle  #KindleUnlimited

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