What the slappy nuts is going, all you fellow porn watchers who’ve picked up here and there that a big ol’ pendulous sack sometimes garners compliments, and now wonder whether scrotal dangle is the new penis size? This is just an afternoon reminder to grab yerselves a copy of Echo and download you some episodes of the Strained Brains podcast! (And to leave a positive review for them as well! 🙂 ) Don’t worry bros and brahs: neither Echo nor my podcast are about a giant pair of slappers that could conceivably double as two cats’ brains shoved into hairy, membranous sck; nah man—Echo’s all about cyborg pew pew, dark socioeconomic commentary, robo-beast monsters, and dope, psychic weaponry like the Blaze Avatar! Also, if you’ve read any of my books, please remember to leave a positive review for them on Amazon. Amazon reviews only takes a minute of your time, and you don’t need to have made a “verified purchase” in order to make them; you only need an Amazon account (in case you read my stuff through Kindle Unlimited or other means). To give you an idea of how big-nuts amazing positive Amazon reviews are to us indie authors, imagine this: you’ve watched the latest episode of Star Wars, and once again decide to engage in that age-old experiment—seeing if you can grab a snack from the fridge through the use of Force-telekinesis. As you stretch your arm out, fingers quivering, the fridge door starts to tremble. Wait—WHAT? This shiz has never, EVER worked before! Sweat beads across your forehead, then a second later, the fridge flies open and a buttload of mountain dew and nomskies mcnommersons come flying toward your grasping fingers. OH yeah! As you start maowing down on a flood of Delicious, Force-Ghost Obi Wan materializes before you and says:
“Not only shall you be gifted with telekinesis, you shall also have the most beautiful genitals in this 52-galaxy cluster.”
He gestures with his luminous hands, and your junk morphs into a divine configuration that would make a goddamn Kardashian weep in envy.
Chocolate on cheese-whiz! THAT’S what I’m talking about, know w’um saying??? See, that rush of joy you’d feel at using the Force how it freakin’ SHOULD be used is EXACTLY what we indie author/podcasters feel when we get a positive review on Amazon or iTunes! (none of that bullshit zen stuff that Luke’s gotta contemplate while we all ignore the fact that he kissed his effin’ sister in TWO OF THE MOVIES). So give your favorite indie author/podcaster (and perennial Man Child) Kent Wayne a John Williams-scored favor and leave him a positive review on the ’Zons or the ’Tunes! Thank You All and have a Good and Chill Night!!! 🙂 🙂 😀
Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here: Vol. 1 on Kindle. Vol. 2 on Kindle here: Vol.2 on Kindle Vol. 3 on Kindle here: Vol. 3 on Kindle Echo Vol. 1 & 2 Combined Edition here: Combined Edition If you wanna hear me babble on about anything and everything, and strain my FREAKIN’ BRAIN, then here’s a link to my podcast: Strained Brains! It is on iTunes, Stitcher, Spotify, and Google Play! Please give it a listen and a five-star review! Here’s the miscellaneous gear that I use to try and become an uber-human: Optimization, and last but not least, my buddy Jumar Balacy has made a supercool microsite at kentwaynebrain.com! Go check out his computer-based wizardry 🙂 🙂 😀
Hold on! I just got approved to be an Amazon affiliate! If you’re going to buy ANY product from Amazon, and you’d like to support my efforts for absolutely free, then simply click on one of the Echo links I’ve provided—they’ll send you to Echo’s Amazon page—and THEN buy whatever product you wish. Amazon gives me a small referral fee each time this happens! In this manner you can support my books, musings, podcast, zany ads, or my adventures along the noble path known as The Way of The Man Child WITHOUT spending any more money than you were already going to! Should you do this, I vow to send you a silent blessing, causing your genitals to adopt the optimum size, shape, smell, and death-ray attachment of choice that paralyzes your enemies with fear and envy! Entire worlds will bow before your nether parts! 😲💪 😜