What the full-bladdered sex is happening, all of you who have experienced the agony and ecstasy of bouncing and jouncing whilst frantically making deals with the Dark Elder Gods, begging them to use their twisted magics to hold back the impending stream of golden goodies that threatens to burst from your pee-hole? This is just an afternoon reminder to grab yerselves a copy of Echo and download you some episodes of the Strained Brains podcast! (And to leave a positive review for them as well! 🙂 ) Be at ease: neither Echo nor my podcast are about frantic prayers that keep the Gilt-hued Madness from ruining your boff-sesh; nah man—Echo’s all about cyborg super-soldiers, dark socioeconomic commentary, robo-beast monsters, and beautiful future wizards! Also, if you’ve read any of my books, please remember to leave a positive review for them on Amazon. Amazon reviews only takes a minute of your time, and you don’t need to have made a “verified purchase” in order to make them; you only need an Amazon account (in case you read my stuff through Kindle Unlimited or other means). To give you an idea of how clean-holed amazing positive Amazon reviews are to us indie authors, imagine this: you’re sitting around a cold boardroom filled with suits, all slapping their knees, yelling, “That’s gold! GOLD, I tell ya! AHAHAHAHA!” around the custom-made Cubans they’ve got shoved in their mouths. As a bevy of them snort lines of coke off the bleached wrinkles of hookers’ assholes, one of them comes up to you and offers up his fist. It’s covered in $1000-an-ounce chocolate.
“Lick it clean if you want to keep your job.”
As you contemplate the dark, immoral world you’re about to step into, your imaginary friend, Caveman Barbaro, materializes atop the conference room table and punches the corporate fatcat right in the fucking face. The hookers erupt into high-pitched panic, and you and Barbaro jump into a good old fashioned fisticuffs, beating the snot out of a mob of predatory money-movers. Just as you’re about to ask what you’ll do now to earn a living, Barbaro throws you a tied-off pouch that clinks with the unmistakable sound of heavy coin. When you open its top, you see the sparkle of precious metals gleaming from within.
“Come with Barbaro!” your friend cries. “We’ll have many an adventure, drink much mead, and tap legions of booty!”
Oh hells to the hizzow YES! See, that giant rush of quest-boner you’d feel at being yanked out of office-bound deviancy into a dreamworld of magic is EXACTLY what we indie author/podcasters feel when we get a positive review on Amazon or iTunes! So do your favorite indie author/podcaster a long sword + 3 favor and leave him a positive review on the ’Zons or the ’Tunes! Thank You All and have a Good and Chill Night!!! 🙂 🙂 😀
Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here: Vol. 1 on Kindle. Vol. 2 on Kindle here: Vol.2 on Kindle Vol. 3 on Kindle here: Vol. 3 on Kindle Echo Vol. 1 & 2 Combined Edition here: Combined Edition If you wanna hear me babble on about anything and everything, and strain my FREAKIN’ BRAIN, then here’s a link to my podcast: Strained Brains! It is on iTunes, Stitcher, Spotify, and Google Play! Please give it a listen and a five-star review! Here’s the miscellaneous gear that I use to try and become an uber-human: Optimization, and last but not least, my buddy Jumar Balacy has made a supercool microsite at kentwaynebrain.com! Go check out his computer-based wizardry 🙂 🙂 😀
Hold on! I just got approved to be an Amazon affiliate! If you’re going to buy ANY product from Amazon, and you’d like to support my efforts for absolutely free, then simply click on one of the Echo links I’ve provided—they’ll send you to Echo’s Amazon page—and THEN buy whatever product you wish. Amazon gives me a small referral fee each time this happens! In this manner you can support my books, musings, podcast, zany ads, or my adventures along the noble path known as The Way of The Man Child WITHOUT spending any more money than you were already going to! Should you do this, I vow to send you a silent blessing, causing your genitals to adopt the optimum size, shape, smell, and death-ray attachment of choice that paralyzes your enemies with fear and envy! Entire worlds will bow before your nether parts! 😲💪 😜