Get yer copy of Echo!

What the plip-plop is going on, my fellow stealth poopers who’ve had to play the diabolical game where you quietly wait within a public bathroom stall, listening for that telltale rush of the hand-dryer, or the flush of an adjacent toilet to mask the unholy roar that’s about to emerge from your super evil orifice?  (there’s a fortune waiting for someone if they invent some kind of muffling device that can effectively mask both splash and flatulence).  This is just an afternoon reminder to grab yerselves a copy of Echo!  (And to leave a positive review for it as well!  🙂 )  Rest assured:  Echo isn’t about the auditory game of cat and mouse that’s part and parcel of dooking in public; nah bro!  Echo’s all about cybernetic two-gun soldiers, robo-rowr-beasties, and beautiful future wizards!  Also, if you’ve read any of my work, please remember to leave a positive review for it on Amazon.  It only takes a minute of your time, and you don’t need to have made a “verified purchase” in order to do it; you only need an Amazon account (in case you read my stuff through Kindle Unlimited or other means).  To give you an idea of how stupendously amaze-faced positive Amazon reviews are to us indie authors, imagine this:  instead of a viral pandemic turning everyone into zombies, over 90% of the world has been turned into NERDS.  (I love nerds, and consider myself to be one, but I find the idea of a nerd-plague highly amusing, so I’m gonna take a few shots at ’em)  You’ve spent months in hiding, moving furtively from safe house to safe house in the dead of night.  During the day, in order to avoid detection, you wear coke-bottle thick glasses, a polka-dot bow-tie, and snappy suspenders that secure your pants several inches north of your belly button (can’t be too careful, right?).  In order to get to the next safe house, you have to cross a sprawling courtyard filled with geeks, all of whom will rip you limb from limb if you mention so much as a single word about sports, nightclubs, or fashion sense.  You traipse carefully across, throwing in extra snorts for good measure.  But then you inadvertently show your hand:  when a dork-faced fifty-year-old casually wonders, “I wonder why everyone used to be obsessed with sex?” you reply:  “Because it feels AMAZING.”  FUCK!  You halt in your tracks—like Mission Impossible Tom Cruise freezing above a clear-as-day landmine.  Thousands of bespectacled eyes turn toward you, and all conversations abruptly cease.  You look around, laugh/snort, and awkwardly add, “Or so I imagine.  Right?  Right guys?”  Sunlight flashes off their glasses, whiting out their eyes and making them all look like Agent Sith.  In the deadly still silence, one of them screams:  “NON-VIRGIN!”  And then they come charging at you, coalescing into a snarling wave of unified hate.  You start sprinting, barreling through handfuls of dorks but there’s too damn many; in a matter of seconds they’re gonna be tearing your liver out from your torso.  You clamber up a lone cypress tree in the middle of the courtyard, but the nerds quickly surround it and begin shaking its trunk.  The cypress sways dangerously back and forth, and you clutch it with your arms and your legs with all your strength, babbling fervent prayers as tears stream freely down your cheeks.  Suddenly, fluff begins drifting down from the sky—protein powder!  As it touches the nerds they start bursting into flames, voicing anguished wails as their allergy to all things anabolic kicks into high gear.  After a few more minutes of pants-shitting terror, you’re able to climb safely down and resume your journey.  OHMAGAWD!  Thank Batman for that completely improbable save!  See, that rush of gratitude you’d feel at not being torn apart by vengeful dweebs is EXACTLY what we indie authors feel when we get a positive review on Amazon!  So do your favorite indie author (and perennial Man Child) Kent Wayne a geek-o-fied favor and leave him a positive review on the ’Zons!  Thank you all and have a Good and Chill night!!!  🙂 🙂 😀

Get Echo Vol. 1 on Kindle here:  Vol. 1 on Kindle.  Vol. 2 on Kindle here:  Vol.2 on Kindle  Vol. 3 on Kindle here:  Vol. 3 on Kindle  Echo Vol. 1 & 2 Combined Edition here:  Combined Edition 

Hold on!  I just got approved to be an Amazon affiliate!  If you’re going to buy ANY product from Amazon, and you’d like to support my efforts for absolutely free, then simply click on one of the Echo links I’ve provided—they’ll send you to Echo’s Amazon page—and THEN buy whatever product you wish.  Amazon gives me a small referral fee each time this happens!  In this manner you can support my books, musings, upcoming podcast, zany ads, or my adventures along the noble path known as The Way of The Man Child WITHOUT spending any more money than you were already going to!  Should you do this, I vow to send you a silent blessing, causing your genitals to adopt the optimum size, shape, smell, and death-ray attachment of choice that paralyzes your enemies with fear and envy!  Entire worlds will bow before your nether parts!  😲💪 😜

 

#kindle #kindleunlimited #sciencefiction #scifi #books #novel #book

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